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Click herewhen I was blind I listened
to the wind the laps of waves
my pine scent heaven shadowed me
from the changing shades of day
a heart drum beat a languished life
played melodies quaint and strange
no voices no word came to me
on wind in the lapse of days
as viscous dusk enveloped me
with memories faint and strained
no words cross spidered page
a heart drums beats a vanished life
plays melodies faint and strained
a loved voice came as memories
in distant waves shades of days
a heart estranged drums repeats
a pine scent envelopes me strains
in the changing clay of hades
as spiders drum dead memories
God! I'm home! Hello, my love.
it actually feels blinded by the repetitions, as if the flow shrouds the meaning to the point where you are trying to assemble sight through fingertips for the first time. there is a deep sad resignation as if the narrator has after a few days of being blinded has accepted his "fate" in sounds of heart beats, and the soft scurry of spiders feet.
as viscous dusk enveloped me
to me gives the dark a liquid feel, thick syrupy as if you subverted the cliché "moving through molasses" and points toward the way being blinded stunts the way you have to move about slowing it all down.
any way 5ed,
Others have said hypnotic. That's how I'd describe it too. The absence of punctuation stymied me, but the images were so powerful that I read it again and again. Enter "hypnotic effect," much like a chant. I'm not sure if that (deliberate omission of punctuation) was intended to produce a hypnotic effect. No matter; it did.
Figuring out is fun to do. You use your words to make a mystery of meaning. The emotions that ring clear are of loss and romantic love. My personal interpretation is this poem is about an emotional awakening from a period of self inflicted handicap. It is both beautiful and dense. Yet, the voyeur in me wants more. The ending is abrupt. I do enjoy the way abrupt endings have a way of pushing imagination off a cliff, but can't help thinking you could fill in the blank better than me. Loved the repetition and the laps and lapse was awesome.
oh yes, this…luminous, dreamlike, disarming, lovelier for all that. Thank you!