Queen

Story Info
A girl is used in a ritual to pay off a debt
1k words
3.62
40.5k
11

Part 1 of the 2 part series

Updated 10/30/2022
Created 09/23/2012
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I screamed as they dragged me through the cemetery, their laughter and jeering affecting my mind in the worst possible way. I was either going to get killed or raped, I wasn't too happy about either of those. But I was hoping it'd stop at rape and I'd stay alive. When they stopped dragging me, I screamed louder and louder until they tied me down and started to circle around me. I tugged at the ropes and looked around me. There was some marking carved into the ground with fire and something sharp, there were candles of the black and dark blue and purple varieties. I screamed as one picked up an athame and cut himself with it. He let it run down into a bowl and bandaged it when he thought there was enough. There was an altar it was resting on, the bowl. It had a bunch of ingredients that he put into the bowl, one by one. Then he was picking up the bowl and swishing it around with a brush.

He came towards me with it and I started screaming louder. He leaned down and brushed it over my exposed chest and stomach. They'd long ago ripped off my clothes of course. Then he swiped it down my legs. He lifted up off his knees and put the bowl away on the altar. He picked up his athame, still covered in his blood and my screams became more urgent, he paid no heed and started to chant something in another language. He chanted and walked just outside the circle of carved symbols. He flicked the athame every few steps and suddenly he was all the way around at the beginning again, flicking his blood at me and smiling gruesomely. The symbols stayed silent and I was sure they were done with me, I was certain nothing bad was going to happen. Then my gut twisted and I saw the air in front of me start to waver like air above hot tar streets. A rip opened up, and a monster put his head through. "Master, we have brought you an offering. A queen for your underworld! A woman who rivals all in her abilities with magic and her purity." I screamed louder and thrashed around, trying to get away. He came further out of the light and I saw his form more clearly. It wasn't a monster. It was a man, a very large man in black robes with a pair of dark bat wings on his back. I stopped screaming to look him over, I wondered if he was going to eat me and started to say my prayers to god. He flinched.

"She invokes god's power in my circle."

"I told you the stupid bitch was still a Christian!" The head man turned and slapped the boy who said that.

"She is pure, she is corruptible. We knew there would be some challenge in it. But you like challenges in hell don't you?"

"True. She is a virgin?"

"Of course." I looked at them as they spoke, back and forth, back and forth.

"We will take her, but you owe us for one more soul. She will make a good queen, but she will have to be broken in. Perhaps she will even take a long time to completely corrupt and break." He turned to me, his golden head waving in the cool air as if he gave off high levels of heat. His eyes were a bright crimson and burned into my soul as the where the whites were supposed to be is black. I scream again and he smirks at my distress. "Quiet." I instantly still, my body unable to make a single sound. "You will not be harmed. In fact you will be highly prized and rule over a quart of the denizens of hell. Until you corrupt. When you become as horrible as the demons who live there, you will become one yourself and will no longer be queen. But one of the ruled. Do you agree to these terms?"

"Will you kill me?" I tremble as the vice around my throat loosens enough for me to speak.

"If you refuse to be our queen, you will be force changed into a demon."

"... I agree." I was crying now and his grin was positively feline.

"Good, now I will take my tribute for your crown." He actually flew over to crouch over her body, her legs under his head. He leans down and from his mouth drips a long, thick tongue.

I shudder and shiver as he laps up the blood and other things that were in the bowl. His tongue moves up over my thigh, then he moves to the bottom of my other leg and laps up until he hits my hipbone again. His tongue swirls into my bellybutton as he moves up, his appendage slapping my skin over and over again as he dipped into the bloody mix. It was nearly dried on my skin so he had to suck at my skin in some places. I felt too scared to be at all affected positively by this but my body did quiver when his tongue moved over my breasts, his teeth pulling at my nipples as he sucked and laved them with attention.

He was finally done, standing and snapping his fingers. I could suddenly move again and the ropes binding me were gone. I stood up and he kneeled down in front of me. "My queen. All hail the queen of the fifth quart of hell." Everyone outside the circle knelt down and hailed me as well. I sighed,

"Are other demons going to do that too?" Now that I got what was going on, I wasn't too terribly afraid anymore. I'd be in charge right? That meant that I would be able to keep myself from corrupting... right?

"Yes, my queen. They will all bow down when you are introduced."

"Can we go then? I'm tired." He stood and took her by the hand,

"Then we shall go. I shall get you dinner and serve you the finest wine."

"How about an appletini, I can't stand wine."

"As you wish." I smile at him as he smiles at me and realize as we're walking through the portal that, hell I could get used to this.

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4 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
I liked it.

Pretty good start. keep writing

sherrylee1015sherrylee1015over 11 years ago
Concept is sound

I really think an editor or proofreader would be helpful for you. There are several misused words such as quart instead of court. There were also changes in point of view that could be much smoother. Another method that is helpful is to read yoour story aloud.

I hope this is helpful for you.

Sherrylee

Whitefire25Whitefire25over 11 years agoAuthor
Longer chapters

There will be longer chapters I promise. I just had to get it started you know? And I dunno about pregnancy yet, maybe.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago

Good but longer chapters and she should get pregnant

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