All Comments on 'The Hell in Your Eyes Ch. 08'

by TwistedMisery

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  • 36 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
very good story

Would like to see it get a bit naughtier

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago

Cmooooooon, tell them us more about Jack. Where the hell did he came form, any psychotic backgrounds, past relationships, whatever

But aside that, this story keeps getting better and kinkier

Ps. Friendship is magic

-rita xx

FA_JFFA_JFover 9 years ago
Good to see his cock is not entirely magical

That she still has concerns about his volitility is realistic and keeps the story in balance. 'Cause the dude is a grade A prime nutburger with a very short fuse. Your development of his character is exceptional. For all the panting and moaning, I find myself mostly waiting for the inevitable SWAT stand-off.

I can usually spot the plot direction a mile away. I really have no idea where this will end up. Points to you.

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
Next Chapter

Love this story and hate waiting for the next installment. Give us some background on Jack..get Sam to move in or have one confess love to the other.

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
He's psychotic and she's in high school.

A train wreck in the making. Courtship, dating, is where we present the very best version of ourselves...if this is his best, then what's it going to be like when he doesn't have to be "controlled"

Lets see him break her ribs or drive her head through the drywall and laugh as she spasms uncontrollably. Lets see the bruises he leaves on her as he reminds her whom she belongs to.

And before you ask, yes. That is what happened to my cousin, at least until I found out about it. I still remember the sound of his knee breaking as it was hit with a wooden Louisville Slugger, the way his voice cracked as he cried like a little girl as he felt the steel tied boot impact his groin in a front snap kick. The way the blood spurted from his ruined nose as a knee was rapidly thrust into it. Granted, my cousin was only in a coma for 3 months and I spent a year in the crowbar hotel; but strangely, he never laid a hand in anger in her again. Granted, it may have been because he shattered his non dominant hand blocking my first kick. Sensei also said to block with a closed fist...guess some people didn't get the message.

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
wow....

this story is getting better and better. it would be interesting if she moved in and then had to work on a project with another guy or something along those lines.....

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago

"I find myself mostly waiting for the inevitable SWAT stand-off. " HAHA, me too! I'm on edge every time Sam meets up with Jack. Man, he gets angry over everything! Although he's already shown her what he is capable of, I feel she's only grazed the surface of his hot temper which is unfortunate. I'm glad she still has her hang ups. Great sex ≠ compatibility.

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago

This is a strange relationship. He's old enough to be her father, and until they both get older, that's bound to cause issues if they go public as a couple. I don't see any parents letting their daughter finish school living with an older man - nor would the parents approve of the relationship due to the age difference. After all, what do Jack and Sam have in common except sex? Yet there's a part of me that wants to see them together, with some sort of happy ending (although I have no idea how there could be one). How does Jack earn his money? How will he be able to support her while she's still in school and what if she wants to go to college (especially if it's not local)? Yet, Jack is growing more considerate of Sam, though he's still pretty selfish. She wants more time, yet he picks her up that same afternoon/evening. Great story idea - and keeps getting more interesting as it evolves!

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
love it

I love the progression of Sam's feelings towards Jack matriculate into I dunno like. I love her inner turmoil. I can't wait to read more!

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
Thank you!! Going to dream happy!

LOVE Jack's character......strong, forceful, and demanding....just my cup of tea

I'm like drooling (and i don't mean just the mouth....) every time you describe him.

But what does he do for a living?

Does he rob banks or what, when he's not doing her?

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
better and better

I love this story i never want it to end i cant wait for more

save_the_animals_jbsave_the_animals_jbover 9 years ago
Age

I love the age difference, when I was 18 I dated guys around Jacks age (or older). For those people saying he's old enough to be her father, he's in his 30s and she's 18, stop being dramatic.

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
Next

Next Chapter please!!

joodlejoodleover 9 years ago
Very hot

This is a very hot series. While it is pretty much based off of a rape story, Jack is a very intriguing character. Very hot, love the double scene. Love when he gets mad.

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
The Social Distortion references are everywhere!

First off, great story, really, really, amazing. Had me hot and bothered through out. I haven't read all of the comments in the other chapters, but it seems strange to me that someone is yet to comment on how similar Jack is to our very own Mike Ness; the dark, thick hair and those abyssal eyes. Then there's also the last line. I don't even think I have to comment on that one do I?

Keep it up! Really looking forward to the next chapter ;3

black_maestrablack_maestraabout 9 years ago
Great writing...

First off, you're a great writer. Yeah it's a 'rape story,' but their dialogue, personalities, and the sick way you actually made their twisted and complicated (to be kind) relationship evolve.

Second, Jack is kookoo for coco-puffs for sure, but he does prove the theory that crazy is crazy, but not stupid. Sam: "I guess I'm getting used to you." Jack: "You know that sounds crazy, right?" This banter is top of the line. He is hilarious and Sam can counter his crazy ass comments all day long. Love their tit-for-tat. 'Brat' and 'Jack Ass.'

And third, at first I was hating Jack the 'rapist' right along with Sam, but I guess I'm just as twisted, cause now I find myself cheering their relationship on. You did an amazing job of revealing Jack's various personas (the monster, the sexual dominant, the selfish little boy with his insecurities [yeah, even Jack knows he's not all there], and the guy that wants to love Sam like a normal guy).

But what will Jack do in September? Sam has to go to college.... Oh shit!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Next chapter????

Love the characters!!!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Love!!!

Please update.

I love this story!!!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Agreed with others

Love the story so much more please! Hoping for an update soon.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Update!!!

Been waiting so patiently

Hopefully more than one chapter comming out

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago

love this story so much! PLEASE WRITE MORE SOON

freakyjessifreakyjessiabout 9 years ago

Please write more. I love this story

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Give us the goods!

Please keep going. I love the uncertainty of when Jack will lose it next. Also, I'd love to know more about Jack. What's his story? What was up with the waitress in the diner a couple of chapters ago? I need more!!!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Post!!

Please write and post A story - any story! You haven't blessed us with your superb storytelling this year. The natives are getting restless!!! We need something new to read. :D

TrippyLuvTrippyLuvabout 9 years ago
Ditto...

I need an update. I literally check everyday hoping to see a new chapter. The anticipation is palpable. Please!!!!!!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Now What?

Where is the next chapter? Did all our comments and suggestions scare you off? Too many possible directions to go? Don't know how to wrap it up or what? Don't over think it. Just go with your gut. It's. all your creation and it's up to you where to go from here. Whatever you do, give us more - at least enough to show that your relatively long absence doesn't mean you've given up...

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Can't wait!

I loved this story. I couldn't get enough of it and read it over and over again. Then I noticed on your first page that you were writing the last two chapters. I squealed with delight!

I can't wait!!!!!

You are a captivating writer. And I've read all your stories, but this one has mesmerized me into feeling emotions I haven't felt for a while.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
unseen in 2015

Hey babe you alright? Just check in with us from time to time let us know some real life jack didn't get cha and lock you away from the world. Kinda worried you just went silent the last few months. Xoxo Maliceon

I_Enjoy_Your_StoriesI_Enjoy_Your_Storiesabout 9 years ago
Yioupeeeee!!!

I just read your update. You will be posting chapter 9 soon. Can't wait!! Thank you :)

TwistedMiseryTwistedMiseryabout 9 years agoAuthor
Note From The Author...

The Hell In Your Eyes Chapter 09... has just been uploaded. It should post fairly soon. Thanx for the love. - T.M.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago

hello , it says chapter 9 is posted but i can.t see it .

TwistedMiseryTwistedMiseryabout 9 years agoAuthor
Postings

Once I upload something... the site owners then have to approve it. It usually takes roughly a day or two. It's pending to post on 02/23/15. So, it should be listed, and available sometime after midnight tonight. You can check for it then. - T.M.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Incredible

I have read through this several times and love it! Your character development and the actual story, it's jncredible I sure hope to see more!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 9 years ago
Age matters not

For people who might be a bit turned off by the age gap..its not that big of a deal really. She's 18 and he's in his early 30s. Totally date-able if you ask me. Personally I think its kinda hot too. Also she also doesn't act like a stupid teenager like most 18 year old do which is a good thing. She's 18 and she acts like an adult, he's 30-ish and behaves like the way he behaves..totally immature. But hey, can't deny that I find it totally sexy..that caveman attitude. As long as its not real life..haha.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Great story and character!

Although it started out rough, I like how the story and the character develops. It's the kind that makes me miss them when I'm done reading, I keep coming back for more!

AspieGirl88AspieGirl88about 2 years ago

That’s the one thing that I don’t get about this story; the fact that Sam is a legal adult who is capable of giving consent to sex/relationships, yet she’s worried that her parents are going to be a problem? They no longer have a say now that she’s 18 & if they hear about her lover & start making her home life difficult, she can easily just run away & be with Jack. Police can’t do anything & if that’s what she wants, that’s the first thing they’d tell her parents. I’m hoping she’ll realise all this in the chapters that follow, because although the story did start off a bit too much, Jack is starting to shine like the fabled diamond in the rough & I'm eager to see him become a better person under Sam’s influence (much more than Jack being a worse influence on Sam). Keep it up!

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I'm a professional fiction writer. I enjoy delving into the dark, and slightly twisted. No matter the response, if it affects someone on an emotional level, then I'm satisfied. I enjoy feedback of all kinds. Good, bad... doesn't matter. Be forewarned though that if you leave ...

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