by Linbido
I like the structure of your sentences and your word choices, your imagery is really good, but you misspelled the very first word in your poem if you meant coraline and that would be logical... I think this one is potentially too good to have been posted in such haste
sigh, groan, grumble, mumble *off to move one letter and resubmit*
hug,
-Lin
A beautiful read, somewhere between dream and myth, flowing like the sea it portrays.
#L
ps. Maria, don't you mean Coraline instead of coraline? ;)
Lin, the first word may not be the sole mistake. You write:
"that have felt the soles of lovers"
and
"the memory of sorrowed soles"
Do you mean "sole" (which does work in a footprint/wearing down sense) or "soul" (which would be more traditional).
Either or both ways the poem is most enjoyable. >?(((><
Yes, my fishy friend, that was most intentional. Souls woulda been too cheesy IMO.
THE perfect word choice in that context Lin, it brought to my mind the images of people walking on the beach and I have a tiny foot fetish anyway, but I think it was the best word to use
umm, yeah Liar, I did mean it with a Capital C
< giant raspberry> :)
I've gone and sumbitted an edit. I still can't believe that I let that one slip by. I checked the text three times.
Hugs and kisses to all of you for putting up with my flimsy. :)
-Lin
So many images issue forth from this piece; it lures you back in for another read or two or three...
So many images issue forth from this piece; it lures you back in for another read or two or three...
This poem was mentioned in the Archival Review thread, in a picking through Lit's archive of over 35,000 poems.
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