All Comments  for

11th. P. Dreamchild's Revenge

byTeenage Venus©
All
Comments (11)
by Anonymous

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by 07/05/04

and Dreamchild lived happily ever after

Boring!

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Teenage Venus07/06/04

Sooo predicatble

Hi, Chilli,
Your comments always seem sooo predictable, lol. But always welcome.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by cantdog07/06/04

needs an editor

To lie, that is, to recline: lie, lay, lain are the principal parts.

She lay on the sofa, she had lain on the sofa

To lay, that is, to place (upon sth.): Lay, laid, laid are the principal parts

She laid the jodhpurs down, she had laid them there for a purpose.

there are other things, dangling modifiers and whatnot, which an editor would have caught.

I like the spare plot, which is silly but fun.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous10/26/04

...and I thought Fatal Attraction was scary...

Holy Crap!

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous05/19/05

This story rocks

I certainly enjoyed this particular story the ending was witty and the plot was thick I fell however that it needed a bit more imagery in order to make the reader feel dreamchilds anguish. As for the previous comment true storytelling has no bounderies of grammar only emotion and words

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by 10/27/05

Completely

imaginative and suspenseful...you have a way with the gore that's quite visual. Great job

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous09/27/06

wwoooowww

totally sick. I'm not sure if i liked it or not.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous10/07/06

tragic

The ending made me very sad; how could she do that to poor Sarina? Other than that, amazing story, loved the horror of it.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous03/01/07

That surgery took away all her humanity : (

She silently suffers and then speaks out against her tortuer. Intruging, the puppet strikes back. If she undergoes surgery why doesn't she ask for her nerve reciption back too? She has the money and dear daddy's notes. Of course you had to ruin the whole thing! She was the victim and according to her, dear daddy took away her innocence. Okay I get that, but she still does have a soul even if her body is a fuck machine. You have her accuse him of mutilating HER body? When she not only shows no empathy or compassion for her slave whatsoever, when she is the only one who cares about her. To be frank she is insane! To be robbed of her pleasures and take that away from her only friend for her own benefit! The bloody fuck machine! She takes exactly after her dear daddy! She could have taken the clit from someone other than her slave... o_O What kind of a souless monster are you? Of course you probaly think you did well after that insult. She still is human not android, couldn't you have had her spare her companion? She should now die, because she is just like that damn father of hers, hurting those who care. And that slave... I don't believe she's human, NO ONE, I repeat NO ONE would allow that so willingly, unless they take a vow of celibacy and no more bodily pleasures. but thats a 1% of the population in total. Did she threaten her poor server? They're all going to hell! hwhahahahahmuhahhwhahwhaheeheeheheheh!

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by mystery_wonder11/27/07

Nicely... Horrific...

Great story... loved reading it... the only thing i was dissapointed about that the lack of descriptions... I personally think it could have been elaborated on in certain parts which just would have added to the already fantastic story... :)

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous12/12/10

(:

i hated reading the beginning and i hated reading the ending too. but the story wouldnt be good if i didnt hate it.

beautiful job. its taken me a while to realize that feeling intense hatred toward a story can be a breath of fresh air.

the cycle must go on. maybe a second chapter? i would love to read another.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.

Click here to leave your own comment on this submission!  or
Back to 11th. P. Dreamchild's Revenge  or
More submissions by Teenage Venus.

Add a
Comment

Post a public comment on this submission (click here to send private anonymous feedback to the author instead).

Post comment as (click to select):

You may also listen to a recording of the characters.

Preview comment

Forgot your password?

Please wait

Change picture

Your current user avatar, all sizes:

Default size User Picture  Medium size User Picture  Small size User Picture  Tiny size User Picture

You have a new user avatar waiting for moderation.

Select new user avatar:

   Cancel