All Comments on 'Hyperion'

BT!!!

the iambic part of your iambic pentameter is off, sugah. I like how you used Hyperion as a metaphor, instead of telling the story. That was interesting in comparison to Tristesse's historical context. I'm glad that you tackled this form, what do you think? Would you do it again? Did you enjoy yourself?

this almost sounds like an apology of sorts, but the human condition needs no apologies, we are what we are :rose:

love these lines-

A worker bee among the human hive,

lost in the to and fro of now and then.

..perspective. I like the idea but, as perks already pointed out, the rhythm is shaky. It's a tough form to use smoothly and you did well with yours TT2u.

This felt a bit forced to me, too, Tung, but still very good. Thanks!