All Comments on 'Poker with Mom'

by arcbound08

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  • 28 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
not horrible...

definitely need an editor and some premise as to why this is happening would have been nice.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
pretty good

her son should take her ass next

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
Hot

This is very hot stuff. Got real hard just reading it.

D.irtyO.ldM.anD.irtyO.ldM.analmost 19 years ago
One step at a time

Before you decide to post another story, you should learn how to write a sentence. Hopefully you are aren't too old to learn to recognize a run-on sentence and the difference between past tense and present tense.

Even more basic: remember that fiction and realism are not mutually exclusive. If I were to write a story and describe someone lifting a full-size car over his head, I would make sure the reader knew he was Superman or The Six-Million Dollar Man. Likewise, if you write about an adult man who's mother decides to have sex with him after he tells her he is horny, you normally should try to explain this unusual behavior. Hypnosis? Drugs? Nymphomania?

I'm sure there will be some horny stroke artists who disagree with me and tell you not to bother improving yourself. Unfortunately, those people aren't your co-workers or bosses or perspective employers or anyone else you might want to have a good impression of you.

Wahoos1000Wahoos1000almost 19 years ago
Very poorly written

I couldn't get through the first few paragraphs. The story idea may have well been a good one, but I couldn't get by the poor grammar.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
english, or lack of a decent education

I do suggest you go to school more often, or live in a country where english is the spoken word,

FitzgeralFitzgeralalmost 19 years ago
good stuff

I liked it. Strip poker with mom is a good idea. You really capitalised on it's erotic potential. Don't worry about the grammar, syntax, or spelling. I make those mistakes too. The important thing is the substance. I got what you were aiming for and liked it a lot.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
Lack of education...

I can't believe I wasn't my time reading this story. The person that wrote this is either twelve years old or lives in a foreign country. Your grammar is TERRIBLE!!!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
great story

great story who cares what the others think keep up the good work and maybe for your next story it could be about a sexy aunt if you need to know about an aunt for inspiration let me tell you about mine lol

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
One Of the Best Incest stories

Keep going . It is good and Erotic. Donot give attention to the distructive comments . Thank you

AnonymousAnonymousabout 17 years ago
It's ok...

The title is hot but...

looking1964looking1964over 16 years ago
more,more,more,

more,more,more,Please

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
very good

you know what mate that story is awesome dont listen to these losers.

gramma or bad gramma that is a good story and easy to read

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
Go to school

Very badly written.

Fubar2kFubar2kover 13 years ago
Sorry to be a naysayer ...

You desperately need an editor. The concept was interesting; the grammar, the verbs, the tenses were all over the place. If you write more, before you submit it, have it edited. It will improve your stories out of sight. But thank you for this. Regards.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 12 years ago
fuckin amazing

too.hot, I must say. Fucking awesome.

keep it going.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago
SEX WITH MOM

i LIKE TO PLAY STRIP POKER WITH SOMEONE MOM OR MINE I DID AND WON

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
ignore the naysayers, this is a good story

It's funny, creative, and well-written. One strong suggestion, though, dear Author. Give the boy a name. You know, like Kevin or Sean or Bill or whatever. It helps the reader personalize the frisky lad, and, surely, his mother does know her boy's name, right? Probably calls him by it sometimes. Like when he's shoving his big hard cock up his own mother's mommy-hole and unloading his young balls up the best, most loving cunt in the whole world--his own mother's cunt.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago

poor grammar but I had sex with my mom after we played strip poker. It was the best sex and poker game I ever had. She is now 6 months pregnant with my twin boys. I am happy to be a father to be.

krazicat99krazicat99over 9 years ago

I agree with the comments about proof reader, it is a distraction. The storyline was good , but a bit wordy. I got the impression that English is not your primary language.

Gina_B_33Gina_B_33about 9 years ago
Terrible

I read the other comments, and I agree with D.irtyO.ldM.an. I only made it through the first several paragraphs. It was just terrible, however, I had to laugh when some of the other comments had grammer as bad as the story.

Gina

KhaineKhaineover 8 years ago
yawn

mom wanted a cock in her pussy but sucked him off, he needed relief after he had already beat off...continuity, dude.

FLSr5rFLSr5rabout 8 years ago
Excellent idea...

But you need an editor. I would be happy to edit your next story for free. Let me know...

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
EDIT

Really needs editing; storyline not bad. Could be longer and really need's to be edited

ROCKY70ROCKY70over 6 years ago
Not a bad story !!!!!

This young man knows how to treat his mom. But you need a proof reader...any way, nice read. thanks

AnonymousAnonymousabout 1 year ago
Ignore the yaysayers

That are telling you to ignore the naysayers. The naysayers are your friends. They want you to improve yourself. The clownish "yes men" kiss your butt because they want to keep you down at their uneducated level.

Listen to people like D.irtyO.ldM.an. He's giving you good (and free) advice to help you get better.

So it comes down to what you want. Do you want to write at a 6 year old level like the idiot rah rah crowd, ot do you want to join us adults in the grown up world.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 1 year ago

I would have given a score of five if not for the changing tenses and bad spelling.

Great story, but consider getting someone to edit for you to make your stories even better!

Dr. BullDr. Bull11 months ago

What a lovely story, thanks!

Anonymous
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