All Comments on 'Mom's New Bikini'

.... sounds like he is 13 and the mother 12

This could be a very exciting story, please continue.

To Be Continued? Only if let an adult proof read the next story.

You wrote "I didn't no what to do because my huge boner in my pants"

no=know

This is a hot story. I think it could really happen just as you wrote it. Perfection not needed in a hot story.

Same thing I said in the email I sent to you...Really a good story...I liked it for a short story, but have another person proofread your stories for grammar and spelling errors, before posting them. It will make the difference between a 3 or 4 rating and a 5!

learn to spell and use proper grammar.

Uh it wasn't the worst story ever, but if there was a contest you would have come close.

Only havng been an avid reader, but would rather critique those sideline critics without ever reading any submitions from them.

Good job, believable, and short.

No, phobos, do NOT continue posting. See my email for detailed comments and suggestions.

The idea of the story was great, and your story telling good too. But your spelling should be checked.

Please continue. Mom needs to be fucked.

I'm here for porn not literary masterpieces. So what if grammar is off here and there. It's short, it's easy to read, it's trashy. I like it, and I hope you have more to give.

Dont worry about What the others have to say , You got the point accross and thats what matters ! Please Go on with the story . Cant wait for more....Signed: The Panty Lover

Don't stop now, go ahead and suck those tits that you were admiring. I think it would be nice if mom offered to suck sonny's cock anytime he would like!

come on don't stop now give us part 2.

Keep going for another chapter and make a little longer story good job.

A good start, please write a part two. Good use of the bikini as the set up for the seduction.

Pretty good hophobos, I like your story because it was short and got to the point. Even with some grammar problems it read nicely.

don't stop now finish the story

Well done! It could be a little longer but good story.

good premise but needed some voyeurism

how about mom's girlfriend stopping by just as son is shooting a load on mom's face and the girlfriend notices cum on mom's chin

Yeah! My 27year old mother sucks on my cock and she swallows every last drop of the warm creamy cum!!

So maybe still a late teenager, 18 or 19. No doubt that his young prick was rock hard as he was writing, he probably shot a good healthy load at the end. He sure liked the idea of a mother handling her boy's boy stuff, his fat cock and his heavy balls. Maybe hotphobos has gone on from dreaming about his mother's mommy-hole to sticking his big prick up in there. If so, way to go pal! Up his mother's cunt is where a boy's creamy sperm belongs.

The succinct.. And on the subject..

- The mother knows what he wants and is carrying it..

Write more "hotphobos".. - In this direction and style, it will be exciting and interesting.

Terrific, loved this story. Nice and fun to read. Makes me quite aroused and happy. Keep writing!

Yes Mommy pose in that bikini for me. I want you to wear bikinis around the house more often.

Can't wait to read more and hopefully soon! Sounds like the beinging of a wonderful mother and son, sharing and growing as lovers!

After school the next day, I really couldn't wait to get home. I was hoping for more of the same naughtiness with my mom as the day before. I looked, but didn't see my mom anywhere, so I went straight to my room. When I walked in I immediately notice my mom sitting on my bed wearing only her robe. I know because it wasn't closed completely, and I could see her bush. She smiled and said, "Get your clothes off and come over here." As I stripped my clothes off in record time, my mom took her robe off and lay naked on my bed. She smiled at me again as she said, "Jack, let me show you how to eat my pussy while I'm sucking your cock."

Learn to spell, please learn to spell. Spell check is not your friend, learn grammar and use it wisely. The story has an interesting line and yet you ruin it by making the reader fill in words or rearrange your sentences just to read them.

I see this was posted in 2005. Glad they didn't continue it for that was just bad. Also the whole premise and the way it went was so childish. Hope the author grew up since then.

Poorly written and edited. Submit your entry to Lit editors, and they can help you take a sexy idea and make it better ... and readable.

The story is REALISTIC because IT MIRRORS A JACK OFF FANTASY!

Only in my erotic day dreams will my mom offer me to suck my dick but that's what day dreams are all about.

If you can not see your mom butt naked, seeing her in a bikini is second best!

DO PEOPLE REALLY USE THE EXPRESSION "ER" WHEN THEY SPEAK? I'VE NEVER IN MY LIFE HEARD ONE PERSON EVER UTTER THE USAGE OF IT. OH WELL.

Err... kinda needs to be longer. Good start though

At least it was short.

When you write "could", don't you mean "couldn't" or "could not".....? You write in several places that you could, example = "Well........ You look......" I could say anything, surely, being tongue tied, you COULDN'T say anything....??

Very imaginatively concei6

ved and well crafted.

The storyline is very very erotic.

If that was happening to me I would think I've died and gone to heaven.

As a young adult i had the hots for my mom.

My mom was in most of my erotic fantasies, including the jack-off ones!

5.0 = 100%, ☆☆☆☆☆+!

MOM'S NEW BIKINI is an excellent mom/son incest story.