All Comments on 'Be Mine'

by sachiaiko

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  • 140 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
Sad and Sweet

Very, very sweet, to say nothing of hot those few moments. Sad too, but things worked out quite handily. Great story.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
as usual

as usual you've kept up with your making me cry bit. lol oh well im a sap. loved it. keep it up girl you're very good.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
LOVE IT

LOVE IT .

I LOVE THE STORIES OF GUYS IN LOVE.

BUT I REALY LOVE, THE LOVE FIGHT LETS MAKE UP.

MAKES MY CHEST HURT EYES CRY LIPS SMILE.

THANK YOU FOR THIS ONE.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
SUPERB!

I was totally hooked. I started reading it while I was waiting to go to work...then I ended up being late because I couldn't stop till the end. All I can say is GOOD JOB!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
Candy Hearts

Sensitive, romantic, sweet and a little sad in places, but the bitter only makes the love all the sweeter. The love scene was hotly erotic without being vulgar, very nice.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
AWESOME

Awesome story, Best I've read in a long time. This was a story of true GAY love, not just GAY sex, as most Gay stories written. It's about time a story is writeen about two men who truly love each other, not just two men who just meet and have sex. There is tenderness and love between two individual who truly love each other one who is Gay and another who is struggling with his sexuality, finally admitting he is GAY. I hope to read more love stories like this, than just stories of m2m sex only.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
Great story.

The story was well written, and conveyed true love between two people and lifes usual obstacle course that affects gay people, and their true hidden feelings. Some spelling and grammar errors, but those can be overlooked.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
Awwww

I loved it.Made me cry

Wonderful writing.

kerbearkerbearalmost 19 years ago
very well done

I loved this story.It was very well written and kept your interest through all of it.I wwas wishing it was longer when it ended,you protraied both people so well and you had my heart going out to both of them.Would love to see about them in other stories

StarInShadowsStarInShadowsalmost 19 years ago
Hey you moved away!!!!

So I noticed you deserted Oregon...we'll miss you. Excellent story btw. It's one of the best romantic Gay stories I've read and they are a fetish of mine so I read a LOT of them. You have a true gift Hon.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
First Gay love story I have read.

greatwork. geat feelings, vey poignant, moving story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
Thank You!!!

Hey lady thanks for not leaveing us all hanging for another part excellent job woman... Your Friend from oregon we all still think of ya.... LOVE YA

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
Flabbergasted

wow, i'm a straight girl and your writing was so poignant it made me long to be a gay man. probably the best story on the site. promise that you will keep it up.

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
Heart felt!

I'm a straight woman that loves to read. I found this site by accident but haven't stopped exploring it. This is the first comment I have left but not the first of your stories I have read. I find your stories to be emotional, heart felt and fulfilling to those that are sick and tired of silly romance novels. So some aren't conventional (i.e. non-human) in what the so-called general public would prefer but it just gives more interest and variety for us to read. I'll be looking forward to reading more from you in the future, I'm even recommending this site to friends who I am sure will be as impressed with your writing as I am!

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
so charming

I wandered into this site simply because i was curious about gay men. i am a straight woman and know next to nothing about gay culture or lifestyle. i think that if a few more people read your story there would be a few less bigots and gay-bashers in the world. it was so charming and romantic, i almost wish i were a gay male.

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
Your story 'Be Mine'

I have read all of your stories that have been posted on this board, and I have to say that I think you are one of the best writers of erotic fiction fiction I know of. You belong right up there on my list of favories, which includes the wonderful Sara Bell from this board. ('The Magic in Your Touch' and 'The Way you Say My Name')

I have to admit that my favorites of yours are 'Ghost of a Chance' and 'Angelic Salvation', but 'Be Mine' is extremely good. I also like 'Paint Me' because I am an admitted cat freak, and the WereLeopard idea was -very- cool. Most of your stories having a fantasy/SciFi theme is absolutely no problem for me, as I love the genres, and read in them constantly.

Keep up the good work.

wildwildbestwildwildbestabout 18 years ago
the entire story is a take me away moment

Once again I ask...why isn't Sachiaiko writing full time and enjoying the spoils of a ridiculously huge contract?

hrefnadrakishrefnadrakisover 17 years ago
Lovely

This was a very lovely and well written story. I, myself, am a writer of slash (m/m) fiction and fan fiction. While I will admit that sometimes I like reading just the smut, I love it when I find a story that portrays the emotional aspect of the relationship as well as the phsycal. You did a wonderful job doing both. Thank you for sharing this story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
Beautiful

I loved this story; it was absolutely beautiful. Thank you!

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
Simply Amazing

I have read every one of your pieces of work tonight that I could find on this site. Each one leaves me in tears of happiness, and longing for a romance like this in my life. Simply amazing work! If you ever came out with a printed book of short stories, I would buy it in a heartbeat!

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
omg i cried so much

i have only 3 woerd for you. "YOUR THE BEST" I LOVE YOUR STORIS YOUR MY FAVORIT OUTHER LOVE YA MUAH

AnonymousAnonymousabout 17 years ago
wowowowwowowowowoweeee

id give you like a 1000% if I could

that was an incredible story. Im kinda a romantic myself and I loved it when Zach was throwing the heart shaped candies at Adrian, simply ingenius and really cute lol. FAVORITE STORY :] keep up the amazing work

PS, u are able to make the sex parts really really long, usually writers just say, Bed, sex, cum, sleep. I liked how you deviated :]

AnonymousAnonymousabout 17 years ago
Absolutely Stunningly Beautiful

I found myself suddenly at the end of the candy heart rainbow laughing and wanting so much more!

It's love like that, straight or gay, that I yearn for sometime in my life and to see it so poignantly portrayed is wonderful. My only regret is that it was short (by my standards of reading).

I'm really interested in seeing if the rest of your work is as beautiful and soul-searingly lovely as this was. Your description of looks and touches, kisses and even the most simple gestures, made my heart pound and flutter and made me fervently wish that I could experience something so profound and perfect.

If there was an award for the best romantic and sexy fiction, I would definitely nominate this story before any others.

lildeb5281lildeb5281about 17 years ago
best love story

i just wanted to tell you that this story has been the best that i have read in a long time.you spent more time on the people then you did on the sex and that was great. i hope you wright more like it.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 17 years ago
wow

wonderful. absolutely wonderful.

AnonymousAnonymousover 16 years ago
*sob*

Tender, romantic, sexy, sensual, funny, heartbreaking, life-affirming, EVERYTHING a good LOVE story should be! well done!

AnonymousAnonymousover 16 years ago
TEAR

That was so good i'm speachless..............

keep on writing:)

writeforlifewriteforlifealmost 16 years ago
Awesome Read

This was a really good story. You're a talented writer. Now if only there were straight boys out there like this my life would be set :-)

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 16 years ago
Fantastic

I'd love to a read a "sequel" of sorts to this, telling Alan and Scott's story.... PLEASE! I need more from you!

AnonymousAnonymousover 15 years ago
More Please

I'd love for you to write a sequel telling more of Zach and Adrian's story

taxpapabobtaxpapabobover 15 years ago
"Be Mine" Is a Daunting Challenge

This story is truly a great & SEXY romance, at once simple and complex in development, steadfast and interrupted in the loving, tender and vulgar in SEX, sweet and harsh in emotion (pseudo-Christian bigots are no fun; spiritually-based adoration is), imbued with both laughter and heartbreak. constant friendship and persistent malice. These two young men are deliciously interesting. I LOVE IT! More, please!

bigblueyesbigblueyesabout 15 years ago
Awesome

I have to say that this is the first Gay Male love story I have read. I loved it. You wrote the story very well. And I love Zach and Adrian. If you decide to write more about them, I look forward to reading it!! Now I have to go see what else you have written :D

JunJaeJunJaealmost 15 years ago
wah...

gosh...i love this...just the right amount of romance, drama, and humor...

"But isn't my ass your favorite part of my body?"<---lols!

cassihcassihover 14 years ago
OH SHIT

I'M WRITING THIS WITH TEARS IN MY EYES.THIS IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL STORY I HAVE EVER BEEN HONOURED TO READ ,THANKS FOR SHARING IT WITH ME.........

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
awesome!

LOVED LOVED LOVED this. I loved Adrian, he was so well-characterized...I loved that he was scared people would find out at first. I know that sounds really weird, but it was just so /real/ that it made it perfect. I could see it happening on a college campus for real somewhere, which was just incredible.

and the sex was hot. xD but honestly, in the case of this story, it was a bonus...the romance was enough to make me love it all on its own.

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. :D thank you so much for sharing it.

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
Adored it!

It was just what I was in the mood to read, cute, funny, REAL and so effing romantic! Thank you so much! You're brilliant!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 14 years ago
Awww

One of the most beautiful stories i've ever read. Written to perfection with the cheesy ending :) i loved it. Please write more like these. Love is something often over looked in sites like these. I hope to one day find a guy that loves me like that and hopefully i can love him that way too. Thanks for a fantasy come true :) the perfect love story

WorldlyGalWorldlyGalabout 14 years ago
FABULOUS

absolutely wonderful!!! fabulous!!!!

I noticed one error tho on the second page:

"I love you, Adrian. I've been in love with you since the day I met you." He smiled, "I couldn't think of anyone I'd rather be with then you." but it's supposed to be Adrian saying it!

Otherwise THE BEST IVE EVER READ!

Go to my profile for contact info

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 14 years ago
smiles

reminds me of one I wrote, just not as long and better...so not so like mine huh?

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 14 years ago
Awww

That was so touching i actually teared up at the end like a little sissy.. I fucking loved it... It was sweet, and told a story about what it's really like to fall in love still in the closet.. i felt 18 all over again lol

MabelCinnamonMabelCinnamonalmost 14 years ago
I read it again

Great story... I always come back to the end and cry. I love it!!!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 14 years ago
I really liked it.

It made me want to know Alan and Scott's story.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 14 years ago
More Please

I loved it and would love another story about these two.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 14 years ago
If my eyes weren't so dry right now

I'm sure I'd be crying ;)

I adored that. It kept sending shivers down my spine and up my chest, and it really got me emotional.

I adored it. Wonderful.

~Mozzarella

RaineTheSageRaineTheSagealmost 14 years ago
Awwww...!

that's so cute!

i hope things go well for them!

i also hope you're writing a sequel... or at LEAST still writing!

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
Absolutely lovely...

This is easily the best story I have ever read on here. You are a wonderful writer, and the characters were so real. It was so very sweet and I loved every bit of it. There were only a few grammar issues, and they could be easily looked over. Such wonderful writing, I do hope you will someday publish some works. I loved how you tied things in with the candy hearts, and I fell in love with the characters. So emotional and wonderful; please keep writing. Absolutely lovely...truly. It is such a treat to read something with meaning and not just empty sex behind it...this story was beautiful beyond words. Maybe this is high praise, but you certainly deserve it. This story is a job well done.

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
Made me cry!!

I am a hopeless romantic and it was so emotional I could barely read it!! I hope you continue writing because I will definitely read it!! Love, a straight girl!!

beibeegyrl_109beibeegyrl_109over 13 years ago
i've only just started...

reading your work today but you've quickly become one of my favorite authors, keep it coming.

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
I loved it

It's my first time on literotica. I am not gay, but I LOVED the story.

I wish I get a boyfriend who is this understanding.

keep it coming.

SoullessCynnerSoullessCynnerabout 13 years ago
Achingly Sweet

This story is so wonderful and sweet. I loved the characters, and I really loved the whole candy hearts thing. (Do they REALLY say "U R Cute" and stuff like that now?) I do have some issues with your misspelling of "you're" and "your." You use the wrong one in the wrong spots. The few other grammatical mistakes I can look over, though. Other than that, I loved this story, and I will be reading some of your other works.

--Soulless

AnonymousAnonymousabout 13 years ago
continue.

i think we should here alan and scotts story.scott sounded like an idiot until alan claimed to love him.then he just seemed so confused and human. anyways thats just me,i would def. read that.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 13 years ago

I cried. Enough said. You're a great writer.

I read A Ghost of a Chance, Angelic Salvation, and All I Want for Christmas. Beautiful stories. Can't get enough.

atheistinokietownatheistinokietownalmost 13 years ago
LOVE IT

I cannot tell you how many times I have read this story, it is so awesome! Thanks for posting! Hope to see some new material out soon!!

Kazehana552Kazehana552almost 13 years ago

Loved this story. I love all your stories. Lol I kinda want a story about Alan now.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
fantastic

a beautiful story. Just watch for spelling mistakes. I'm pretty good at ignoring them as i don't really care as long as i understand. But a couple stuck out to me. Maybe get a 3rd person to check spelling. The more eyes used, less chance something gets missed.

Oh. And i agree with some of the other users. I'd like a story about Alan. Though i still hate Scott. He tarnished my name. :/ have fun. I look forward to your next story. :)

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
Oh My

A beautiful story. I would like to read a sequel on both the boys, Zach and Alan. I am in love with Zach and Adrian and Scot and Alan even though Scot is a jerk. I love the whole story and please keep up the good work.

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
amazing

you're an amazing writer you manage to draw people in to the stories you write & make them feel right along with the characters keep writing!! :-)

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
I just love it

I have read many times already and I still love it!

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
loved it !!

that was a great read i loved the begining with the candies and end with the candies i found it cute i guess its cuse i have the same weird obbsession lololol please keep writing i want more!! : )

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
Fab story

What a great read. I really liked it. Btw Alan deserves sooo much better

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
<3<3<3<3<3

I'm not gay,I'm no guy.. I'm a young woman.. I have gay friends and don't care what people say about gays.. I just read this story and it was one of the best I've ever read.. Personally I think gay people's friendship is the friendship of a life time.. Yes, Alan deserve better but then Zach and Adri's love is true love and that's what it's all about, isn't it?? Like I said I'm not gay BUT would like to be in a relationship with someone showing the kind of love Zach and Adrian have for each other.. This was an awesome story keep writing..

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago

this story was one of the best I've ever read. I'm a woman, and I really enjoy gay stories, especially this one!!Keep on writing...

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
brrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiillllllliiiiiiaaaaaaaannnnnnnntttttttttttt

beautiful story..........:)

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago

I could connect with the characters, and actually felt what they felt. Truly awe-inspiring.

TheSecretPervertTheSecretPervertabout 12 years ago

I am in love with the thought of having the love you expressed in this story... I admire Zach for being so brave as to endure .. everything. As well as Adrian.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago

You should have this published. It's truly gifted writing. Good luck.

skuldsenseskuldsenseabout 12 years ago
In it's own way...Perfect

I truly enjoyed this and some parts made my heart lurch and it hurt but in a good way that I truly believed in the passion and written in a style I cannot do but other than that it was truly a wonderful and fantastic story.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 12 years ago
So Sweet

and in many ways real. makes me scared but hopeful that when i do get the courage to come out i'll still be accepted by my friends but Mostly my Family.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
Great story

I just read this story...it was one of the best stories that I have ever read. It actually had me crying at the end....would be nice if all love stories ended this way in true life. Keep up the great work.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
Great story, but you should really read over it a couple times...

I LOVED the story, make no mistake about that. The only problem is that the wording was sometimes confusing, sometimes you put Adrian instead of Zach, and once you wrote Aidon. I assume you meant Adrian. A simple re-reading of your story before you submit it would clear all this up. I hope you don't think me rude! Just some friendly advice from one writer to another. Again, great story! I cried all the way through!!!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago

I think that Zack should have stayed mad at Adrian a little longer atleast until he got out of the hospital... Oh and also I think Alan should have hes own story where he drops scott like a hot potatao.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 11 years ago

this was the best story I have read on this site It made me cry

AnonymousAnonymousabout 11 years ago

love the story, so sweet, great bit with the candies.

some really confusing changes of POV, and characters being called the wrong names other such stuff. distracting but you have a genuinely good story. take the time to read it through and re-post it and it'll be even more awesome

MoonlightSkyMoonlightSkyabout 11 years ago
It made my cry :,)

This story was beautiful .Not only was it Adrien and Zach falling in love it was also Zach forgiving him and them spending a wonderful valentines day together. Loved it

AnonymousAnonymousabout 11 years ago
I cried!!

This was an amazing story. I'm glad it's not instant porno. It has more meaing than others do. I really love the candy and the flowers. The end was my favorite part.

LavonyaLavonyaalmost 11 years ago
Atleast I'm not the only one.....

I like reading valentine heart candies!

I almost cried!!! it is really hard to get to me to cry when reading (but not in real life cause when I get upset I cry... stupid hormones...)

I really LOVE this!!!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago

A story like this gets so many positive comments from readers, but most of the writers on this site just don't get it: readers really enjoy a ROMANCE. Too many stories here are about soulless sex, and FAR too many are about violent sex. When we read for entertainment, we want to read something sweet and uplifting, not something that leaves us feeling as though we need a bath. Well done, sachiaiko.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago
Touched

Awesome story.

First I thought this is just some story about one guy being control by another, but as i read, i found that it wasn't the case, good job here.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
LOVED it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This was an awesome story and i loved it!

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
One of my favorites.

Love this story it's sweet, charming and tender. I wonder if you could write a similar love story for Scott and Alan? I recognize that may be difficult given the disdain many will feel for Scott, in addition to his self hatred. However Alan seems like a kind, loving individual who deserves more from the man he obviously adores than to just be his "fuck toy". So rise to the challenge and write them a love story that rivals "Be Mine" and allows them to be happy despite the complexities of life. :)

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
It made me cry.

When they make up in the hospital, I was so happy I started to cry. Awesome read!!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago

This was really a very very great way to spend some time out of my Sunday. I could feel the emotions and all. Very well done.

ingilizingilizover 10 years ago
Eau de Rose

A love story just as I like them. Two handsome young men, love, tenderness and romance. You must be the male equivalent of Barbra Cartland.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago

Lovely - please edit for "you're" and "your", though.

Our = belongs to us and Your = belongs to you.

We're = we are and You're = you are.

(Hope that helps you remember.)

DodgeES1998DodgeES1998over 10 years ago
Amazing

Over 137, 000 readers AND ONLY 220 LIKES. What an absurd bunch. The likes should have been equal to the readers!

wawferwawferabout 10 years ago
Ridiculous

Ridiculous how much I freaking love this story! I'm so happy they made up, they really are soul mates. Thank you for this wonderful read, I was feeling down and this definitely brought sunshine into my dark mood.

KissMeLikeYouMeanItKissMeLikeYouMeanItabout 10 years ago
Now What?

Are they still together? I wanted a fuck story to get off on, and got a sweet love story that's got me crying. Is there more to them?

Hutchison12Hutchison12almost 10 years ago
Wiping away tears

Just brilliant ..... Can't say much more,

Thank you.

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
😢😢

Omg I couldn't stop crying the entire time. Very well written and a great story. Pleas write more about this couple or a new story just like this one. Thanks

BiFreakSisterBiFreakSisterover 9 years ago
OMG

I can't stop crying, it's just so sweet and beautifully written, reminds me of a similar incident with my loving girlfriend

ilovegibbsilovegibbsover 9 years ago
Wonderful!

I'm crying and smiling at the same time. You are so talented. What a wonderful story! Thank you so much for sharing your talent with us. Please keep writing. Will you continue their saga? Or have you written others I need to read? I'm new at this site so I pick a letter from the alphabet and start reading. Your story was recommended with an excellent rating, so I clicked on it and read it. Such a terrific story.

kalonaleighkalonaleighabout 9 years ago
Awesome!!

Sweet, funny, couldn't stop reading!! Love stories are my favorites. Really enjoy your stories, keep writing!!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago

The sweetest story I've ever read!!!!!!! :)

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 9 years ago

WHAT A LOAD OF DOG SHIT same old crap different writer

sm1982sm1982almost 9 years ago
Aww

I'm glad Zach didn't quickly forgive Adrian..cute from start to finish with a shake of the head at the consequence Zach had to face because of Adrian's denial.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Love this story

I've read it multiple times. It is sweet, poignant, and Zach is right sometimes all you

need is to be held.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago

This is the most beautiful and amazing things I have ever read. You are an amazing writer. Xoxo

mrsbearmrsbearover 8 years ago

Jesus! Anonymous on 4/26/15, this story whilst having some similar elements is nothing like other stories out there. I've been a voracious reader of the gay male genre on this site. And this is the first story that all wasn't forgiven as soon as one was contrite.

Same as @sm1982 I also appreciated the fact that Zach didn't forgive Adrian right out the gate.

Fantastic story!

ADpenthouseADpenthouseover 8 years ago

REALLY NOT THAT GREAT.

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