by RedHairedandFriendly
Okay, so I'm cheating and voting as though you liked my suggestion about that one word and made the change - and even though there are several other possibilities, it still leaves the core intact - the very heart of what you've written. So there - take your "5" in that spirit.
DC:
You put a lot of feeling into this one. It ripped my socks off. Thank You. Ronnie W.
Yes, they finally got your change in; it looks even better now that it's seen the light of day.