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Thanks a Lot

byJakeRivers©
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Comments (22)
by Anonymous

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by wetapap10/06/05

you've gone

too far, i knew writing this shit would get to you, you've gone over the edge, edge hell, you've fallen off the damn cliff. thanks, thanks a lot, you've broke our hearts.

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by Nightowl2210/06/05

Weird

But a good story. IF they hang the guy!

This might work in non-erotic horror.

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by Kanga4010/06/05

I liked it

Good one Jack!

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by Anonymous10/06/05

funny

edgar allen poe would laugh at your story style.were you reading nevermore lately?

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by Anonymous10/06/05

Loved it?

I don't want to say I loved it - because then you might think I identified with the protagonist....LOL

But I am VERY impressed with your story.......you portray insanity VERY well!

Perhaps you should think of a career in writing Horror stories?

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by 10/06/05

Impressed

It takes quite some concentration to find the madness that hides beneath the thin veneer of societal norms. I like it when someone does it with flare. Great job.

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by Anonymous10/06/05

DynamiteStory

Wish I could articulate how much I enjoyed your story.

I would sign this with my screen name but I'm afraid the crazy crew would punish the author cause I like this.

I can't believe how much story was told with so few words.

I hope you win the contest!

Sincerly

A nonny mouse

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by sack10/06/05

very creative

The interludes were masterfully woven in...very well done imagery which worked to heighten the tension! Two suggestions: Don't title the sections (let the reader discover naturally what happens next) and toward the end, perhaps "gagged" is a better word than "retched".

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by Anonymous10/07/05

First place written in blood!

Nasty and "sick", just the way they should be told !
The ultimate heaven for revenge fricks...
Me included? No way! or may be>>>Hmmmm

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by PAPATOAD10/07/05

Hee Hee

Liked your, Hee Hee, story. Do one again like it next year. It's fun to do something different every now and then.

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by iztheo10/07/05

Great story ...

Great story ... goosebumps are at full attention now. :)

There is something to be said for a good old fashioned slasher story ... Ghosts, werewolves and vampires are scary enough, but we all know they don't really exist. There's something about the actual potential of man-made mayhem that hits closer to home and makes your look over your shoulder. I can hear this story being told around a campfire and see everyone getting freadked out.

I particularly liked the way that you structured the story, interpersing the killer's ramblings into Solange's story. Good luck with the contest ... you definitely should be a contender.

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by BlackShanglan10/07/05

Creepy and Wild

The structure of this adds immensely to the fun and the feel of theatre/cinema. The ending is half horror and half comedy - delightfully indulgent and full-blown. Thanks for an entertaining read.

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by Matadore10/09/05

Jack the Knife

It worked for me. Little sex. Little graphic gore described. All found in the readers’ heads. Plenty of clues, but not enough for you to give the tale away. Fabulous premise of a Psycho party gone awry you have here. I hesitate to award “5’s” but you nailed this one.

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by Bazzz10/10/05

Just what the contest needed

I don't know what it is about this Halloween contest but the stories are always so well written. The difference between yours and the others is your originality. I wish I could give it more than a 5

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by oggbashan10/17/05

Weird and enjoyable

I liked the concept of the interludes in italics and the gradual increase in tension as the story proceeds.

Well done.

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by torchthebitch04/27/07

Wimped out!

You let her off too easy! Personally I'd TORCH THE BITCH. Loved it. Beautifully done. TTB

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by KOLKORE01/13/09

Thanks, Jake

Are we allowed to read this on non- Halloween days (or nights)? I admit, it seems like a the wrong timing, but I just could not wait that long. So Yea, thanks a lot, it was great.

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by oldwayne03/21/10

Outstanding!

Better than Tony Perkins did it in the movies.

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by cliffhanger2011/03/12

I GAVE IT A 5?

For me Halloween was a fun time. Maybe not so much for my victims. I once wired 16 M80s together and put them in an old man outhouse. He always arrived at the same time. So we waited until I figured he was well into his business then I blew up the outhouse. The results were shocking!!!

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by betrayedbylove07/14/13

Nice

Revenge is nice. Especially when it is coated in blood.

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

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by phil221307/22/13

Superbly written revenge with great ambience.

Thanks for a very direct and to the point revenge tale. It had great emotion and simplicity.

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by Tavadelphin12/06/13

A true psycho love story

She was the true bitch - what ever else she was -

He was the true psycho - what ever else he was -

They were the irresponsible shit heads they were - period -

The time of year was right for all to pay a price - live or die - that would last for ever -

Well done -

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