All Comments on 'She Deserves It!'

At least she felt and went through everything he did before she killed herself.

Mainly because I didn't want to come off as abusive. But let me try and be honest best I can.

I hope this was just a random loose story and not a theme you may use in your stories. As a story it wasn't too bad, but it seems really dark for the situation it was given. Almost like you may have been trying to make a point about cheating and vengence. Of course my choice would be to move on instead of getting even, but thats me.

It wasn't a bad story, not bad at all, but it just seemed kinda heavy.

This seems to pick up where Ohio’s story, The Worst Week Of My Life, leaves off.

to easy to take a life.get real.

He did not stop to think of her pain just his own. It is easy to forget the ones that are important to us when we are suffering. It is a story that is a very possible out come in real life. All of us have our moment where we ask yourselves if we would be better off dead. Most of us move from that and go on, but many don't. JDseller

I hope to shout. Suicide over a suspected cheating spouse, after just one week. I think the story committed suicide at the end, it sure looked awful pale and bloody, and definitely felt cold to the read.

I did like the buddy and beer drinking scene in the lounge. Now that was some good jawing going on between the buds, and I’m not referring to the beer.

........

LITEROTICA.

Oh well .... Your first responder was able to jerk off over the theme.

But he's kind of sick too

But I can't say I liked it.

Too many emotions I'm too familiar with for me to really like it.

Still, a nice exposition of how actions have consequences.

But really, the title has it correctly. That she died was her own doing, another selfish act because she couldn't take what she dished out.

Your portrayal of his friends' reactions felt wrong, though. Perhaps if they were women, then the reactions you showed may have rung more truly, but just about every guy I know would have commiserated and agreed with him.

I'm not sick, its sad that she killed herself. The point i made or was trying to make is that atleast she felt how he felt, she went through what he went trough. This woman was a stupid bitch. She lied right to his face, sneaked around behind his back, grew cold toward him,withheld sex from him for three weeks. You tell me, what was the husband suppose to think. Remember that he did catch her when she lied to him. She also had the nerve to get angry and leave when he confronted her, and that tell me that she was guilty. She could dish it out, but couldn't take it. If she hadn't killed herself, than the next time before she did something so stupid, she would think long and hard about it. The comment that you wrote, makes me think that you are a sick,wimpy,spineless cuckold husband. LEt me guess, your wife has cheated on you and you forgave her at the drop of the hat. Dosen't it make you wonder how many more times she has cheated on you since than, knowing that you will forgive her. Next time, atleast have the balls to sign your name.

I think those of us who know we aren't perfect need to learn the lessons you've illustrated.

The ending was emotionally sad but literarily (is that a word?) perfect. A gotcha out of the blue!

Well done and thanks.

Phil

The story doesn't say either what she did or what he did, so it's impossible to know wheter the ending makes sense or not. Either he was way over the top or she was. The story was really quite short. What is here is only the ending of a longer (apparently untold) story. If this is a follow-on to Ohio's story, that should have been stated (after getting his permission). The parallels are just too close to at least not to have been strongly influenced by his story!

Definitely some potential here... a little better planning and it could have been a nice story! I don't care how it ends, as long as the story leads into the ending.

I was wondering how long it was going to take for someone to point out the fact that the story tells us absolutely nothing about what led up to the events. I am hoping that the author will now write the beginning so we can understand it better, rather than jumping to unsupported opinions. I like the writing, the tension, not to pleased with the ending, but that is me. I'm a happy ending type of guy.

JimDinMN

very sad but a good story

I have just transmitted an revision of this story. Thanks for the helpful comments, especially from JimDinMN and Dynamite Jack. The risk of trying to tell a story economically is that one may say too little.

At the risk of saying too much and being to obvious, I intended this story as a tragedy and the title ironic.

It seems that not only is his wife a loser, she can dish it out but can't take it.

I agree with the other commentor that the story is really too short to make an adequate judgement over who is being abused and who is being used. We only know of the situation from his point of view, along with that of a few friends. The point I see though is the wife was totally disrepectful to her husband in her efforts to help another couple. For whatever reason she felt the need to deceive her husband about what she was doing and why she was doing it.

What I don't understand is why helping this man kick his drug habit would make her cut her husband off from sex. I mean, was she too tired after babysitting this man, that her husband hates by the way, that she's too tired to take care of business at home? Where was his wife during all this by the way that she felt she had to treat her husband like this.

Now that he understands what has happened I think he may be overreacting a bit but I'm not in the guy's shoes. So he leaves the house for a week to teach the old lady a lesson. Maybe he's right and maybe he's wrong, but she's a weak willed idiot for killing herself over this.

While he may be hurting now he's probably better off without this mentally ill bitch.

There are a lot of similarities to Ohios story The Worst Week Of My Life. The ending is obviously different but the events preceding it are comparable.

The revision of the story is now the one that's up; it differs significantly from the original.

N.D.

SleeplessinMD

Venegance is always a conseguence of anger. The opposite only holds true when referring to somebody else's anger.

Anger is still anger, even without venegance. And the one who has the pride saved from being hurt, has already been lucky enough.

Either love is something else or it is just a word.

Vengence is the single thing that gives a man back his manhood. In the case where vengence is clearly called for many so called writers wimp out and revert to San Francisco style politically correctness. Political correctness is ruining the world and all the men in it. Now in this case the wife sorta got what she deserved. Her unfaithfulness was not trusting her husband, That is as unfaithful as you can get. Brendan was correct in what he did but he , perhaps, should have monitored the wifes condition. Two wrongs don't make a right and both were wrong in thus case.

There are levels of unfaithfulness. Both characters are guilty to a certain degree. The wife expanse in the end how she was unfaithful by being inconsiderate and insensitive. But she is also very unstable. Instead of getting angry at her husband she commits suicide. The husband loses faith in his marriage. He can not come to grips with the fact that his wife did not see the situation the way he did. She had no intent to do as it appeared. She was oblivious to the perceptions of her husband. He did not comprehend this and thus out of ignorance he acted. He lost faith instead of confrontation and possible reconciliation after finding out the truth. She died for nothing. He will pay the rest of his life for her stupidity and his lack of faith.

hell get over it...i dont think hell have a problem with her doing something for an enemy any more ...as for the enemy maybe he will die as he was suppoosed to now that he killed his savior....lol and now hubby can find that perfect woman one that will not decieve him

Despite the author's obvious strong suggestion that she probably should have been awarded a medal of honor for her self serving claims of ignorance and innocence (like it was the first and only time she acted like that...) <P>

Even without taking into account the last straw for me, in the form of the “surprise ending” –superfluous and ready made for day time television drama, the story suffered from a deep flaw with its basic premise. Throughout the story it is presented as if one can choose only between two ways of reaction to an unforgivable act of betrayal; either by being magnanimous, forgiving etc. or by being merciless vengeful etc. There could be numerous and nuanced in-betweens, from proportionate similar action to quick divorce and on and on. When the husband chooses one of those in betweens (far from ideal, far from being the worst) – he is continuously being condemned as a monster - <P>

Which brings me to the next point. I am so tired of the stories where supposedly “friends” come to the character who is agonizing and in pain , and instead of acting like friends in need should act, they start…stepping all over him moralizing all high and mighty with their perfect records in managing relations – so supportive! Then they go on to sanctimoniously preach to him, verses of sainthood virtue in the vein of turn your other cheek…They need not agree with his actions but they could ( or rather could not) lend him support for the pain he suffered as a result of cruel number his wife pulled on him. I’d say with a wife – and friends like these who need enemies. What a selection of characters… <P>

BTW, FYI, for the uninformed, an eye for an eye has not been read literally for millennia.

You had good material for hubby. It could have been used much more effectively, without the easy out of death.

You are full of total horseshit. (No caps needed prick) He may have been a little dramatic in his revenge but only a guilty coward kills herself. She must have had a good reason. She was a cheating fucking worthless whore cunt. Remember, she took her own life. Now she's decomposing, her soul burning in hell.

Just an insane persons opinion.