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Elemental Things

bybluerains©
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Comments (5)
by Anonymous

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by sack11/11/05

ah yes, the fairies dance!

a magical, haunting little gem!

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by WickedEve11/11/05

nice, but...

If you drop "butterfly" and leave the line to read "gathering birdsongs and wings" it would be a great improvement and take away that butterfly/unicorn/bunny kind of cuteness. Of course, you can successfully use those words in a poem, but I'd toss this butterfly out. :)

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by My Erotic Tale11/11/05

nice but

I don't think you should change it it speaks from the mind of blue perfectly from you

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by Bill Dada11/26/06

^

I agree with Eve about the butterfly thing. The line also seems to have a better rhythm. I really liked
'daring to hide
glamour from the sun.'

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by duddle14611/26/06

Lovely!

I feel as if I have been listening in as butterflies share their little intimate secrets! Well Crafted! Enjoyable Read!

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