All Comments on 'Our First MFM'

There was all this build up, then the sex lasted a paragraph with no attention to position, endowments of the participants, or who shot what where. There was no dialog or discussion of feelings during or after. Disappointing after a good build-up.

What sex? maybe the guys got it on sailor. And when hubby is on sea duty She can find a few guy's and girls who can satisfy her she obviously needs more then he can give. She just wants what ever she wants and he's to much a wimp to say anything but yes dear. But she loves him, oh yeah! That's why she wants others. Writing needs alot of work. No emotion or sex scene. They don't know love just, their own personal satisfation, that's all that counts.

The odd part about this tale is that, according to your bio, it is your first submission, even though you've been a member for 5 years. So you enjoy reading erotica, and now you're attempting to write it.

Notwithstanding what you see in porn shots, actual double penetration is quite complex; it takes a lot of effort to line three people up that way. Your descriptions of the event are lacking detail in every respect, i.e. whose on top, whatever.

Stick with reading erotica.

Your story writing needs some work....I felt you were rushing the story...why did you have her remove her panties? Why did you all go to a strip club? Seems like if you have just asked a buddy to fuck your wife that you would of gone to the motel and got to it.

Check the how to category...there are several articles on writing short erotic stories....

Any women out there who would like to find two men for an mmf threesome, either for a one off experience or for regular meetings can find what they're looking for by contacting Stevie Bee at Friends with Benefits UK.

congrats to the author for a nice job...hot and erotic