All Comments on 'A Price Well Deserved'

Sluts and wimps. Ho hum.

Practically the exact same story was posted years ago, but the guys were watching an American football game and the girls on TV were cheerleaders (Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders maybe?). Other than that and the Australian(?) accent, same story.

I'm sure it was just chance on the writer's part.

to watch his wife get fucked by other men. Damnb! I mean it has to be i the water over there. Every fucking Limey wants his wife fucked by other men. Sick fucking country and wimpy men and whore wives. Wish I was there to service all thsoe white wives that's for sure.

... was mentioned in the new story thread.

Here is the review thread:

http://www.literotica.com:81/forum/showthread.php?t=428901

Here is the thread that you can comment on the review:

http://www.literotica.com:81/forum/showthread.php?t=428875

Have a lovely day,

Lizzy

This type of story always gets a few of those "I hate cheating wives" comments. Personally, I think that's the most stupid comment you can post; Literotica is full of sexually 'deviant' stories, if you can't handle it, maybe you should ask a grown-up to screen the stories for you before you read them.

Don't listen to 'em, Kurisu.

About your story now: I peeked at your bio and saw it was your first story. I have to give it to you straight, it showed. Don't get me wrong, what you've written is quite ok, it's what you didn't write.

You say the girl is hot. That's just not enough, at least not for me. If you want to paint a picture of a person, you can't just explain what that person looks like, even if you just want me to know what she looks like. You need to give the reader time to paint his/her own picture. Let the characters interact for a while, before the sexiest part of the story starts.

As a reader, my mind doesn't just see what the writer tells me to see, it fills in the blanks by itself. If the girl seems like a sweetheart, I see one type of face (maybe not the same one as you see, but it doesn't matter, all I need is some picture, the more vivid the better) and if the girl turns out to be a stuck up snob, I get another picture. You get the picture...

Now, I'm only starting out as a writer myself, so you probably shouldn't take this advice too serious. After all, writing should be fun and you should write about what you want. And how.

I have to give you one advice though, I can't take credit for it since someone else told Me this, but it's good advice if you want to improve as a writer. The advice is this: Read.

Read a lot. It will teach you what you think is good writing and what you think is poor writing. And then, just add spice.

Wow, this turned out to be a long comment, almost as long as your story;) Kidding.

Finally, keep writing!

I liked your story, but I have one question: why does Dave put down two twenties and a tenner and then pick up the twenty he threw down earlier?

Must not be much to do in merrie old england these days. Sheep herding's gone by the boards but that new english tv show is great for the mates of the mates.

"How to cuckold yourself in several short lessons" that new marital instruction series on normal tv in the morning has apparently taken off judging by you and several other new english cuck writers.

The bad side of it is how it is negatively affecting the local major non-manufactering industry and the pubs which used to be the focal meating points. Now then Arry aint doing much pint or quart business as every one who counts is at at a mates house fucking his wife or at home watching their wife being fucked by his mates who brought the ale. I mean talk about a pub crawl.

To combat this freakie pathetic wimp movement, parliment is entertaining a joint motion by the pimps and pub owners to stop all weddings for a 20 year trial period to get the professional whores and pubs back up to par or birdie.

It makes sense if you think about it open mindedly. I mean it is so basically to the points. The wimps won't be able to marry for a generation or so right so that freakie english wimpiness has a chance to die out.

But more importantly, the wimps will have to hire professional whores to cuckold themselves with which means da pimps are back in business for at least the next 20 years or so - more at eleven.

Now you gotcher women who would be wife whores but now with no hubbies to cuck they do the only thing possible right. They become professional whores for the pimps - wow this is really starting to shape up.

Then as this no-marriage phase in takes place, the wimps can't just stay at home and pine away without anyone to wimp out so they go back to the pubs enmass (cazillions of them)to drink their pain away where after a national 6 pint minimum the pimp approches them to offer a professional whore (sometimes an old girl friend)who has been trained to act as a wife whore to go home with them for no more than 3 hours with 2 or more maties to fuck her then return to the pub to turn in the acting wife whore back to her pimp(an old uni mate) and the rented pink fuzzy slippers then have the remaining 3 pints which were part of the initial wife whore contract.

This is also a great time to compare notes with his fellow wimps and the pimps with their fellow pimps while the pub owner works his ass off serving pints to all the happy maties.

Jeez - all this to reconstitute two major english non-manufacturing industries.

Those english devils - they weren't bored they were just looking for a new challenge.

So writer - mums the word on your cottage industry or it could cause a national uprising begining on the FTSE.

lol just listened to that sad wanker who said all english men are wimps and their wifes whores, i have to say that the mayority of the stories i read of this content are from america, he just sounds like either a prick irish yank who hates brits or a black guy who hates white people, oh and by the way we invented the english language you thick dipshit and i would like to see you spell it right u dumbass. lol

He could do "anything he wanted to" to her, so did he knock her up, too? I remember when I was in the U.S. Air Force and stationed in England. Those Blokes seemed to get their rocks off by letting one of us Yanks fuck their wife, and if she got bred in the process, so much the better because the British government paid allowances to unwed mothers of babies that were not children of their lawfully wedded husbands. And those wives were extra hot!

And another Yankee wanker writes a load of crap. Nearly 90% of the stories written on this site are written by wanky yankee, and in almost everyone of them they end up arse fucking (not ass, that's a donkey) Now that to me means that they are really a load of latent homosexuals. They try so hard to be macho men in their films, and in the films they are but in life they truely are the wimps. An example in the brit army we have a team of 4 guys to do a job the same job in the yank army is done by a team of 20 and it takes them 3 times as long. Please do not try to bore me with the big rough tough yank image. Your really only any good at arse fucking. Load of queer bastards

Well like the American when I was in the RN I went to a US navy base met some woman on the base who wanted to fuck nice, pretty on the mature side did what was needed only to be confined to ship like all my ship mates for screwing the base commanders wife she liked it a lot more than her husband.

All women in America who aren;'t of irish descent like the English accent and for a country who has microsoft as its major industry and breaking the Geneva convention as its alternate a little less comment on major industries. Perhaps the wives who had American servicemens children are responsible for the fact that most English people dislike America.

If the reader likes this sort of story it is OK who would want someone who is supposed to be a friend who knows when you are out to shag your wife?

It always amazes me the people who will read every word of a story, no doubt diddling themselves the whole time, and then be critical of the content. I thought you wrote it well and encourage you to provide more tales of this BARELY teenage saucy slut.

Unfortunately, by placing the action behind closed doors, you took out most of its potential impact. The narrator was also too laidback, even for this sub-genre.

Incidentally, don87654 is talking bollocks when he claims UK women get a specific government allowance if they bear a child by someone who isn't their spouse, but it obviously taps into his fixation about extramarital conception.

I thought this story was well written and had very good descriptive sex in it . Thanks for the post....Rich

And a stupid cockold, his buddy will be fucking his wife from now on, might even get to rais his kid if they don't throw him out. Why is this a turn on?

NOT A GOOD ENDING

Well,it was not a good start either !!!

This is NOT a story, it is a rambling of mentally deficient trailer trash.

She told you everything? It started our as a good story but, you dropped the ball with the ending.

A cuckold ending to a whore’s story.