All Comments on 'Spiraling Down'

Took a bit of work

Read it three times to make it work;

First one side then the other

Finally all together - then it meshes;

Nicely done complexity.

I enjoyed your unique poem

literary Art

a spiraling descent

of poetic lines

going down

Spiraling

..........Down

(~_~)

yes, it took me three times reading this as well before I really got it, and appreciated the value of this poem...

Especially important was reading the left text uninterrupted. While poetry is worthwhile, unfortunately, not many people give it a chance to get to three reads. I am not sure if this is something that you as a writer should concern yourself with or not? And I am not sure what I would suggest you do. Perhaps go a little longer with just the left text, to get the feel of what is happening, to get a feel for the conversation going, give a minute before the spiral starts to take place and desire spins itself in.

I know that the intent is to give the feel of distraction, you did a great job with that :)

Enjoyed!

yes, it took me three times reading this as well before I really got it, and appreciated the value of this poem...

Especially important was reading the left text uninterrupted. While poetry is worthwhile, unfortunately, not many people give it a chance to get to three reads. I am not sure if this is something that you as a writer should concern yourself with or not? And I am not sure what I would suggest you do. Perhaps go a little longer with just the left text, to get the feel of what is happening, to get a feel for the conversation going, give a minute before the spiral starts to take place and desire spins itself in.

I know that the intent is to give the feel of distraction, you did a great job with that :)

Enjoyed!

Anna's right-- a very fun-to-read poem! Well done.

Fly