All Comments on 'Fucking Mom And Her Daughter'

Pretty good premise, but you really need to get yourself an editor. The typos and grammatical errors were just too distracting.

Zero is really to high a score however..........

But I couldn't finish the story. Because of the spelling, grammar and syntax, I was laughing too hard by about halfway through to finish it. Once I saw what little was left, I realized that I hadn't missed much. You go from first meeting to first threesome, and taking the girl's virginity, all within about two pages of typed text.

Yes, many stories on Lit are far-fetched. But if written well, it hardly matters. People know when they're coming in here that they're reading a work of fiction, and they are prepared to suspend a level of disbelief. But quite frankly, this one borders on the absurd.

It needs to be fleshed out, drawn out, and completely re-written with someone else looking over it as an editor. Everyone gets bad reviews once in awhile, but show the story to one or two people who will look at it critically for you first, and you'll cut down on the number of negative reviews you get, you'll raise the ratings of your stories, and you'll increase the enjoyment of everyone reading.

Good luck. You're going to need it.

Like another commenter I couldn't finish

Not bad for a grade school kid. One can only assume that you have the education of a 6th grader. This story shows all the imagination and skill of a manhole cover. Writing is not your calling.

You sure your not from Smallville? Go back to school and learn how to spell.

get an editor and get some experiece

This is an adult sex story. Read between the lines. This is a Hot! Hot! story. One stud and a Mother and Daughter, as your neighbor. How lucky can this guy be! Keep the story going!

Get yourself an editor... your story telling skills need a ton of work.