All Comments on 'Caller ID Ch. 09'

It remains to be seen whether Marvin is up to the challenges that lie ahead.

writing for a ten year old.

Good story, good writing. In the real world Marvin should be kicking ass by now. I hope he's not a wimp.

Author get a grip on your story telling....Marv has never acted this quiet and passive in the past chapters. Give the man the "cogliones" before he becomes a wimp especially in the eyes of his girls. The whole thing seems like a charade with everyone wearing masks...sounds more like an Italian opera dosen't it...please be more creative in writing about the consequences....which I know won't happen. Maggie is morwe concerned about being caught than regretting what she has done because she truly believes she has done no wrong... to her hubby, her daughters and to her marriage. Don't have her say, if confronted,"I'm sorry...you were not suppose to know"...It was only sex...I hit 40 and felt I was missing out... or garbage to that effect...and save us on the psychobabble too!

Don't have her say to Marv that she gave herself to protect the girls like someone wrote. Test the laws of Roberto's immunity, by setting him up to sneak into house late one night say 1:30am for a rendezvous with Maggie only to find himself in one of the girls' rooms [thinking it was Maggies]. Marv punches him and knocks him out and charges him with breaking and entering and the attempted rape of a minor, his daughter. In court, either Maggie confesses or Roberto confesses or neither is believed but are fully humiliated. He either is sent to prison or exercises Diplomatic Immunity...this would be interesting especially if further females came forward accusing him of rape also.

But please don't have Marv do something stupid like damaging her pills etc to get her pregnant...Marv should forcefully forgo any further lovemaking and drop hints like hiding her pills and/or lingerie on different days thereby having her go crazy not finding them only to find them at the same spot that she thought she left them. Or inform Roberto that he knows and see how that swings back to Maggie.

I hope you have a complete story outlined and not just writing as you go. If you removed all thoughts in this chapter...it would be your shortest...everyone is doing more thinking than talking.

Of the thousands of stupid mindless pathetic offensive vile stories in the LW categories this one hits a new Low

He KNOWS his wife is fucking a 19 year old..........he KNOWS beyond all doubt she is lying about it........... and KNOWS that she just made a "date" to met him and fuck Roberto again... he has Heard Roberto say he loves his wife...

so when the super wimp pussy amn sees with his OWN EYES that Maggiew is taking birth control pills this super pussy wimp man says

"She's taking her birth control pill," he thought. "What am I going to do?"

a new low in stupid. Please author Kill yourself as soon as possible

make your characters alot more REAL. no person acts that way. interacted w/ teenagers lately? they are more mature than you think and they can be very direct when there home is threatened. and that is what is happening in this story.

If you read her biography you ll see why that idiot write such stupidities...she have a wimp at home...if he is still alive cos she is so old like the Earth...she never know a real man, just some fuckers that use her for fuck, suck, piss, shit and vomit into her filthy body and now she canot know what is a real man s behaviour into such situation

She just write what her sick mind shit in the morning...she never heard about love, trust, marriage, children, married woman s behaviour that love her family...she thinks that all the women are whores like she and her mother was

Just some ideas from a sick mind of an old, ugly, stupid idiot cunt canot be named STORIE...she s pathetic, im sick

Take a baseball bat with you, if you need it, Marvin, and hit a few homeruns on the son of bitch OR with your feet and hands kick the shit out of him.

The wife? Move her to another room until the girls are gone and then the street.

...the writing is almost infantile.

What happend from the time he entered the hotel room to the next morning ? did they drink coffee ? have sex ? what ? where the fuck is that part ?

Your writing is fine and as the story progresses the characters seem a little more believable. Your efforts are appreciated and your story is certainly worth reading.

or saved in the marriage to her. She plots against her husband, lies to him, cheats on him, lets her affair interfer with the raising of her children, has no respect for her husband, and is very simply now a slut to involved in her adultry to be able to think. Her actions with a student should take care of her employment. The husband needs evidence to make sure the wife does not get custody of the children, sex with a student should be sufficient for that. The diplomatic immunity thing makes hubbies choices difficult. The only choice is the total disappearance of Roberto. If he hurts Roberto the family can get back at him with no punishment due to diplomatic immunity. Castration of Roberto will stop his new hobby of seducing married women and taking young girls cherries, but he would be then able to get back at the husband. Nope total disappearance is the answer with no trace of where he ran off to. Marv needs to quickly rid himself of his slut as she will try to seduce him and the chance of disease is to much. She is now a cheater, actually has been for a long time, and will never ever again be a loving wife. Once a cheater, always a cheater. She is also mentally ill thinking only with her vagina, she needs medical help. That doesnt mean a counselor or therapist, those really arent qualified to handle mentally ill people, she needs a medical doctor and treatment.

This is scary - once again I agree with Harry. The characters in this story (except for Megan) have IQ's of less than 80. The writing is hard to follow and there's nothing erotic in the series. In Ch. 10 give Megan a gun and have her put the entire ensemble out of their misery.

Marvin's brass knuckled fist needs to meet Maggie's whore face again and again and again prior to selling her to a Tijuana Bar where she gets gang fucked by donkeys for the rest of her short life. Roberto the Black Italian gets the Belfast Six Pack ( shot in the ankles knees and elbows with a .45 at very close range). Marvin escapes all consequences, wins lottery and sleeps with more women than Wilt Chamberlain.......

All is good and right.

What is wrong wid theese silly people? I love you moggie so please carry on wid thiss super fun story.

Love Roberto xxx

I know that this is some kind of youth fantasy of you. You are probably a fat drooping tittied bitch. Your writings sure sound like it. Hey don't you think it's time you put an end to this. Robeeerrrtttoooo may have diplomatic immunity but that's worthless against an angry husband who will stomp his ass from now till the end of time...Oh by the bye...Maggie commited a crime when she forged the prescription...She can go to jail for that...let her meet bubbas sister there.

I was hoping Marvin would find out I'm glad to see he heard it for himself. I thought that Maggie loved her husband but now I can see that she does'NT love him. The THRILL of the AFFAIR is to strong for her to stop it.. Good story that is getting better..

Paul

object to a previous comment about her getting gang fucked by donkeys.What if the poor donkeys(which are gentle creatures)catch an STD from the slut.

But then here is a self cuckster in the formation as the woman writer grinds it in his face. That of course excites her and the few other sick people into male humiliation. His self disrespect coupled with her non-respect make this writer into something of distaste from anyone who values the reasonable use of talent. But from her bio it mirrors the way she feels and acts towards her own wimp. She will crash unlike her whore heroine who she can puppet off the RR tracks, when her wimp regains a little self respect. Can you feel the disgust writer? Sadly I don't think you care - about anything but your wants. So sick on little sick one.

I live in Charleston and both my daughters played soccer,both club and high school and one now in collage,but the story got too me,too short,nothing happining,now after skipping last 3 pages I read other comments and am glad I missed them. I thought you had somthing good when you started.Soccer dads are not wimps,remember that.

Enjoying the story and looking forward to the conclusion.

<P>

The haters can't distinguish between fiction and fact. It's sad that they feel so threatened by a li'l ol' story.

and its not going to be fit for consumption. TK U MLJ LV NV

Very captivating! She is digging a deeper and deeper hole for herself, yet you still feel sorry for her. Good story!

Tell your father that your mother is a cheating whore.

She is a Slut and Marvin better get his lawyer called because he is a dumb cuck if he doesn't. They need to deport that home breaker, Roberto. Hope Marvin gets revenge on both his Slut wife and her little lover boy...

This chapter made no sense. First. Why didn't anybody see his vehicle when they were dropped of at home? Why was Maggie surprised when he came in from the garage if he was home when they got there? And what a coincidence that he would see and hear Maggie talking to Roberto through a slit in the bathroom vanity. First, how did he know Maggie was going to call Roberto? Second. How could he see all the way into his bedroom from a slit in the bathroom vanity? This chapter didn't make any sense starting with him hearing everything between his daughter and Maggie and then seeing Maggie undress, in the shower, and just where she hid the condoms and birth control. Why would she need both if one would suffice? Why did she need birth control if Roberto is not going to be around for that length of time. Why would she forge her husbands name on a prescription if she knows that the pharmaceutical company will send him a commission for the prescription?