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A Welcome Gift

bybishguy©
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Comments (8)
by Anonymous

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by hansbwl03/24/07

So what?

Is this supposed to be a great gift? She had sex with a woman before they married, and tells about it. Well told, but very little to be excited about.

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by Anonymous03/24/07

Nicely done.

And from the way it ends, I'm guessing she's been much, much naughtier than she's let on so far.

Wondering where the lawyer hubby was ...

Looking forward to more, Bish.

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by Anonymous03/24/07

Still unwrapped...for the most part

Good first effort - just a couple of grammer and puncuation errors.

This was really more of a scene than a story, wasn't it? Is this a series unfolding? A confession (on her part) about to be expressed?

This could be the start of something interesting. So far though, you've given us a glimpse - not much of a view.

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by CAP81103/24/07

Interesting concept

There's actually a gem of an idea here: the wife using words as sexual foreplay, confessing to some naughty erotic act and in the process driving her husband mad with excitement.

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by Ronnie Wachuka03/24/07

A Nice Start

bishguy,
Hope you continue the story 'cause it's hot and looks like it will be very interesting and even hotter. Thank You. Ronnie W.

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by Anonymous03/24/07

Pick a new subject

Listen you "writer" men and women are dying in Iraq. Dear Johnpussy stories suck the hind tit. You have never been in combat nor served your country as no one who has would write what is the same sick crap as women deserve rape. That is what you story is in confidence rape. Pick a new subject and think of the half a million solidiers and families who are dying so you can post shit like this screwing with them.

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by Anonymous03/25/07

Seems the wife is telling the husband about her

true self. It is erotic, but if you are going to have her tell him about her secret sexual activity while he was in service, you are just writing another adulterous wife story of a woman with no ethics or morals. Safe sane consensual sex requires both mates to have prior knowledge and agreement. I agree with the other critique writer a dear john letter by voice is still the story of an unfaithful wife. Please dont go there and tell how her girlfriend was working on her without her husbands knowledge or consent and never mention the other woman set her up as a fuck toy for her husband. Granted there are men in service that would get a kick out of it but most would go nuts. And his actions would be called post traumatic stress syndrome but really are inability to accept his wifes infidelity. a marriage contract is a contract that can be modified by both spouses but when one acts outside of the contract the marriage is null and void - divorce is the only acceptable solution.

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by 03/25/07

I agree with both

"an interesting concept" and "still unwrapped."

There is a fair amount of potential for more development. The Iraq thing is not pertinent. Assuming there is truth in her comment about the described events being before they were married then this is just a story and not particularly a "cheating on the troops story." And yeah, I've been there and done that (and gave the tee shirt to my son and a Beret from a French Artillery guy to an ex girl-friend.) 82nd airborne ... Ft. Bragg, Fayetteville, etc.

Regards, Jack

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