All Comments on 'Laura - My Little White Slut'

by Mr Thick

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  • 3 Comments
BazzzBazzzabout 17 years ago
Needs more than just the sex

It was okay as far as a purely sexual story goes but there isn't that much more effort involved in putting together a plot around the sex. I realize that the sex was the most important thing for you in this story and that's fine but a plot would make it that much more erotic. Additionally you used the word once at least 7 times in this short story. Maybe it's just me but after a few paragraphs it kind of annoyed me. Put a thesaurus next to you when you write. Then when you feel you have used a word more than a few times you can easily get another that fits.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 13 years ago
god dannngg

Fingered so hard to this.

james_38671james_38671almost 11 years ago
HOT

good story sounds just like my wife, she loves to serve black cock like that and i enjoy getting to watch as often as i can, and she enjoys telling me about it when i can not be there, this is something she would go wild to do every week

or more often

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