All Comments on 'Fighting to Claim her'

when you go to edit your work after you finish writing it, make sure you're editing it so that your reader will understand it, not just you. I found some sentences that made little sense to me in the scheme of the story but probably made sense when you read it, because it's your story.

I thought it was a great first effort. Nice storyline and plot. I hope to see more of your work.

Thanks

it put a damper on the story when you started using measurement - literally - 9 inches in length and 3 inches in width?" Unless you're a land surveyor I don't see how you can gauge his size to such accuracy. Even so, it would take away some of the eroticism. You should have use example instead like maybe as long as your forearm or as thick as your wrist. Also, you repeated some scenes in exact word, which you should have describe it in different ways but still retain the same meaning. All in all it was not a bad story. Polish those rough edges off and you will have a real winner.

I really loved that! It was awesome! So romantic!

Great, but I'd love it to be longer! If you did that, you could sell it and I'd buy it!

that was awesome I would love if you could write an erotic vampire story with me as the leading female character sometime!

A good read but a bit short. Seemed to be missing something otherwise good.

These characters live in a weird world.

It was very interesting. It was good you had a plot and hot sexy scenes. But there are some problems. Your story could really do to be longer and to have more detail. You seemed to rush it towards the end. And I like her, im not sure what her name is, thats what I mean its just not long enough to really enjoy. And she went to him, Stolkholm syndrom? Or no? Im rather confused by that. Dont let her be just another women in these types of stories that "AH Im so afriad... wait your hot... oh ok lets fuck casue now im in love with you!"

But i did like it so please keep writing!!

I would agree with the other comment, I think you could use to make this longer. Look to add more detail but you have a great start so far. I look forward to any continued writing you do :)

I love the way you write. But please draw out the story. I will be waiting impatiently for more.

Sexy and romantic. Made me shiver. Very good one off. Stories don't have to be long to be good. A good short-short is a difficult art form, you have achieved it.

Was this story supposed to be a one-off? It always seemed to me that it needed a chapter 2. I have only been on Lit. since 2011, and since then I've had this story up on my favourites list awaiting another chapter. Will you EVER continue it? I hope so, because it's just BRILLIANT.

Ohhh, their story together is surely not finished? There is so much more to discover about themselves and each other. This story deserves at least one more chapter, though more than one would be nice. ;) I noticed it's been a long time since you wrote this, but would it not be easy, I suppose, to take it on again and carry on? It would be lovely to eventually see a chapter 2 to this story. :)

I liked it, is there anymore?

Just fabulous. good build up and so very erotic