All Comments on 'How to Survive Depression'

by Emerald_Dragon

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Alberta  AlAlberta Alalmost 17 years ago
Some times it is for Life.

I have been disabled by depression for 12 years. I would like to add the following comments:

1) The Tom Cruises of this world together, with the 'just get over it' people of this world, should have to live with 'drug resistant depression' for 1 year. Well maybe 5 years for Tom. That would change their attitudes and make them forever thankful that they are not depressed.

2)Consider sleep apnea as an underlying cause of depression becoming unmanageable. If you become depressed as a result of too much stress and inability to sleep, have yourself tested for sleep apnea. I was living with undiagnosed and untreated depression and functioning until home and work stress became unmanageable. When sleep apnea made my blood pressure uncontrollable by medication after 10 years of suffering, a specialist determined my problem and I got treatment. I now sleep well and the medications normally control the depression and high blood pressure. But I am still suffering the results of 10 years of prescription drugs and sleep apnea. For me those are: Obesity 150+ excess pounds; Severe Joint Pain in knees, elbows and shoulders whenever the joints are used; Weakened and oversized Heart which results in swollen feet and lower legs; permanently damaged kidneys; a slowed metabolism that severely affects my ability to reduce my weight; and the inability to do any physical activity for more than 15 minutes.

3)Do not be surprised if you have to change doctors or psychologists many times before you find one that works for you. I am on my 9th Dr., including psychiatrists, and 5th psychologist and believe that I have found the right people.

4) Do not rule out unconventional medicine. I laughed off an acquaintance's suggestion that I try acupunture until he said 'what have you got to lose'. I went from being unable to walk a block with a cane to being cane free and walking 10 or more blocks. I also went from a normal mood of 3 out of 10 to 5 out of 10 (neutral) with regular happy periods. I see the acupunturist every week and do as I am told.

5)Talk openly about depression. That is the only way to change peoples attitudes about it.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
Good advice, and furthermore...

This is very good advice. I have two points to add:

<p>1. Not only does actual depression screw up your relationships, but if you're depression-prone, your brain is very likely to have formed counterproductive habits of stress avoidance, for example, forgetfulness. If you don't remember it, it can't stress you out, right? Well, maybe, at least until the boss calls you in and says, "Where the hell were you last Friday?" Another is not picking up emotional cues from other people in conversation.

<p>This is not stuff that meds will cure; you've got to re-train your brain or you'll keep screwing things up, which increases stress and works counter to the meds. It's not usually really complicated to do -- it just takes persistence.

<p>2. When Emerald_Dragon says go to a doctor, think "psychiatrist." Your family doctor is a start, but really severe depression takes a specialist.

<p>A lot of people are put off by the idea of going to a psychiatrist, because they have the picture of lying on a couch and talking about early childhood memories while some Viennese guy with a beard probes for complexes. Younger psychiatrists especially are much more likely to think of their job as primarily matching the person with the meds and then monitoring the situation. They're, like, doctors.

<p>That also means that you can't necessarily count on a psychiatrist giving you what you need as far as the mental retraining goes -- for that you may need a bit of time with a psychologist or some sort of counsellor.

<p>Depression is hellish. Unlike Hell, however, it need not be permanent. If just living seems to hurt a lot, don't wait for things to fall apart -- go get help now.

Unbridled_PassionUnbridled_Passionalmost 17 years ago
thank you

I am sure this advice will help many people who are in need. Post-partum depression is nothing to take lightly. You are very brave to share your story!

peggytwittypeggytwittyalmost 17 years ago
Very well done with good advice from a participant

So very well done on a very complex subject. The author is only talking about one form of depression. But and I mean BUT she is so right about getting help from a mental help specialist. Your family doctor is I’m sure a great person, but he may want to see physical aliment reasons first and delay a specialized mental health treatment. Do not let yourself be side tracked by time if you know you don’t feel right and have trouble coping with the so called little things of life.<p>Thank you author for your upbeat treatment of a much misunderstood disease. Yes people it is a disease not someone being a nut-job or flake it is a disease!<p>God bless all those who feel the pain everyday and please remember there is new help out there weekly if not monthly.<p>Cure! Maybe not but hope, you bet your sweet arse.<p>Thank you<p>PT

HarryHaversackersHarryHaversackersalmost 17 years ago
Spot on!

You've provided some excellent advice here, Emerald_Dragon. I'd be most please to join you in slapping the shit out of that short assed little turd, Mr. Cruise. ***

I'm like many who've been afflicted with clinical depression most of my adult life, not realizing what the problem was until it was almost too late. Meds now take care of the worst of it, but I've never regained the highs that I used to experience some of the time, and I miss them alot. ***

While a good psychiatrist can do a much for you in terms of both medication and therapy, he/she may not be the final answer. I recommend John McManamy's book, "Living Well With Depression and Bipolar Disorder", which may give you insight into areas of life that your doctor won't or can't talk about. ***

Good luck to you.

Harry

photog112photog112almost 17 years ago
Excellent piece

This is a well written, well thought out piece. I've dealt with depression off and on all my life. I would have years of absolutely no problems, and then times of absolute hell, without any reason other than my brain. I finally sought treatment 1 1/2 years ago when all hell broke loose in my personal life: I got dumped from a long-term relationship (she has her own problems, but will probably never get help), had two friends die, and was involved in a car accident -- all within the first two weeks of the new year. I went over the edge. I can say for a fact that if it hadn't been for my MD who started me on antidepressants (and stuck with me until we found the right ones in the right combination) and a great therapist, I would be dead. There are family members that have the Tom Cruise attitude and have practically disowned me, and others who have stood by me. If you think you are depressed, and it's not just a temporary thing, GET HELP NOW!!!

Also, another book to check out is "The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression" by Andrew Solomon. This book was nominated for a Pulitzer Prize and deserved it.

Alvaron53Alvaron53almost 17 years ago
Insightful essay

As a chronic depressive, I had to learn some very painful lessons on the way to dealing with my depression. Denial is a very formidable enemy. It takes a lot of guts to admit that you're sick, particularly with an affliction for which society is more than happy to stigmatize you. Understanding why you no longer like to do the things you previously enjoyed doesn't come easy. Dealing with some of the syndromes associated with chronic depression like low anger threshold, sleep deprivation and logical function disorder is terribly difficult because they complicate your treatment and make a bad health situation worse.

<P>

The pills aren't necessarily the answer, despite what the pharmaceutical industry would like us to believe. At least they weren't for me. My psychiatrist tried three different medications in the two and a half years I was under her care, those being Celexa, Welbutrin and Prozac. The first two gradually lost their therapeutic value to me as mood stabilizers, and Prozac is nothing more than cruel and unusual punishment invented by some sicko in the pharmaceutical industry. Imagine life in a neurochemical visegrip of mood neutrality, no ups, no downs, just a flatline like you're a zombie. That's a glimmer of what being on Prozac is like.

<P>

Don't get me wrong: the medications helped me but the cognitive therapy techniques that my other doctor, a physiopsychologist, taught me helped me more. I agree with a previous poster who said, "Don't be afraid of alternative methods." because frankly the shrinks and psycho witch doctors don't have all the answers. I'm a scientist by training and disposition, and throughout my life, I have always been a very forceful personality. That's why denial was such a problem for me. I became severely depressed in 1998 when a lifelong friend committed suicide due to job stress. His suicide almost pushed me over the edge with him, and I struggled for three years, denying that I was sick, using willpower and brute force to overcome chronic low moods to keep on keeping on. It took me seriously contemplating suicide to realize that I needed professional help. I was lucky because I was able to get that help, though my long delay ended up costing me my career when I became so depressed that I could no longer do my job and was let go.

<P>

My physiopsychologist came to understand much of what makes me tick. He showed me the distortions in my EEG from the fault in my brain's neurochemistry. He explained how that fault causes my moods to spiral down and stay down. He put me in a frame of mind where I knew I could beat the disease if I acted positively instead being a passive victim. Best of all, he helped me deal with the stigma of chronic depression. I'll never forget his words: "We don't damn people who suffer a heart attack or fall victim to cancer because they're sick, do we? Chronic depression isn't any different. It's a physical ailment and there is no reason, none, that we should look down on the victims of depression any more than we do the victims of cancer." That meant a lot to me because my self-esteem had been trashed by depression. It helped me put matters in perspective, and now I spit in the general direction of anyone who makes light of depression and suggests that "It's all in your head." Strangely enough, they're right -- it is all in your head -- but they haven't a clue what they're talking about. Ignore them because they're ignorant.

<P>

I remained under my psychologist's care for another year and a half until he and I agreed that we had done all we could together. My condition is better today but I'm not cured. I doubt that I will ever be cured of the affliction. I don't have that many bad days any more, and I have some good days every now and again. I'm off all anti-depressants. My diet is better and, while I don't exercise as much as I should, my daily walk does help. My psychologist told me that as I got older, my condition might improve with age because your brain chemistry continues to change. I think he's right.

<P>

Want to know what I really miss? Having a beer. Anyone who's seriously depressed should avoid alcohol completely. I've seen what alcohol does to a healthy person's EEG, and it's not pretty. When you're depressed, imbibing takes a bad situation and turns it into a mental trainwreck. But while I miss a brew at the end of the day, I don't miss feeling so depressed that nothing matters. That emptiness I hope I never experience again.

<P>

I leave you with some sobering statistics, no pun intended. It is estimated that twenty-five million Americans suffer from depression in one form or another. I've no doubt that many of those cases are mild but consider this: one of every twelve Americans suffers from this form of mental illness. There's a good chance that you know someone who is a victim of depression. Still think it's all in our heads? Think again.

<P>

Thank you, Emerald_Dragon, for a thoughtful essay on a very painful subject.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
Your not the only one to experience depression!

I met depression for the first time after a car accident. I was in horrible phsyical pain and emotional pain trying to deal with the change in my life as a result of the chronic pain the accident produced.

The hardest thing is to ask for help when you are at your worst. I almost jumped off by 23rd floor balcony! I still don't know why I came back inside, but I did and told my fiancee what happened that that I needed to go to the hosptial, now. He was in shock, so I called my father to take me to the emergecy room. The wait in the er was long and telling the staff their what I tried to do and that I still wanted to hurt myself was the hardest thing I've ever done. I spend two whole days in a locked hosptial ward while my medication was changed and others were added. I then spent the next two weeks in day hosptial and being costantly watched by my family.

Now, almost 5 years later, I married my fiancee 4 years ago this month and have learned to deal better with my chronic pain. I still see a psychiatrist but I'm not on anti-depressants anymore, but spend over three years on them before we (the doctor and me) made the decision to stop them.

I want people with depression, that despite people not talking openly about it, that you are not alone!

And please, if you feel the need to hurt or kill yourself, please call someone first. Call 911, a friend, a crisis line because when you feel that low, it is not the time to make a decision that you can't change. Things can get better. I'm living proof.

If you want to email someone for support, contact me at twilight0525@aol.com , but if it is an emergency please call 911!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
new depression

I was just arrested and now find myself severly depressed. Your insites are extremely helpful, especially about not being able to afford someone to talk to. I'll definatley find someone now. Thank you for a little brightness in my dark for the moment world

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
Thank You Authoress For Creating Awareness

From the awareness comes the comments which are most insightful to someone like me who sees in the mirror of them a little or more of what I am trying to deal with - but was blind as to what to do.<P>

Hero's come in many shapes and venues so isn't this interesting that a site like this can awaken people who need a mirror.<P>

Thanks Authoress for offering and provoking the helpful thoughts expressed!<P>

With Very High Regard

gatorhermitgatorhermitalmost 17 years ago
Thought-provoking Essay

I would like to elaborate on point #5 - I suffered with depression for years and found that very vigorous exercise - pounding the pavement until I was exhausted - enabled me to cope with it. I don't trust the pharma companies completely so was able to manage it that way (always read the fine print on anything that you take). I think part of the problem many people have, especially in North America, is a sedentary lifestyle, although will concede that this might not work for everyone, especially a mom with pre-school kids to take care of.

madengineer3madengineer3almost 17 years ago
Right On

I had been fighting depression (without knowing it) from jr. high school until I was in my mid fifties. When I was finally referred to a psychiatrist he put me on a medication called Welbutrin. In a short time it was as if the world went from fuzzy black and white to sparkling full color! It was that big a difference. Admitting, as I had to, that there is a basic chemical imbalance in the brain isn't much harder than a diabetic admitting that they need help with insulin. Emerald_Dragon has hit the nail on the head. Get the help you need and do what the doctor says. In most cases they can help! Getting help is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign of strength and wisdom.

bbwvancouverbbwvancouveralmost 17 years ago
Great advice,,,

Emerald, thank you for having the courage to speak out on this topic. Yes, you are anonymous, but nevertheless it takes guts to put your pain and hard work into words and share it with strangers. I would like to add to your comments about medication. I am currently taking 3 different meds, the newest has only been available for approx 1 yr and I have recently begun taking it and have been reducing one of the other two. I agree that when you find the right meds or combination it is like the sun shines every day. And it is due to my very supportive doctor that this is possible. Amazingly this disease, which manifests in as many different ways and for as many different reasons, mostly unexplained, is STILL considered by many to be attitudinal and controllable by the sufferers. The stigma attached to depression makes it even more important that this type of discussion is as public as possible. I try hard not to hide and will discuss my depression if asked. It's also wonderful that your husband is so supportive.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
From a fellow depression survivor.

The advice you offer is completely sound and should prove helpful to many. I did however, find one important element missing. Find a therapist that works for you, and understands that is their role. They don't own you or your life. Surrendering control to a therapist that isn't able to help you is perhaps the most difficult and frightening part of getting treated for depression. "You" have to decide if you are making progress not only the therapist. An ineffective treatment program can be frustrating and devastating to a depression sufferer.

Treatment for depression is all about regaining control of your life, a life that feels totally beyond your control. If your therapist is not helping you after a reasonable period, finding another is a step you might want to consider. Doctors are not all the same and some are much better than others. Changing therapists is not a sin and may even save your life in extreme cases. Mental health professionals will never admit to this but their occupation is more an interpretive art form than a hard medical science.

Admitting that you need help is critical to any depression sufferer. Getting the best help for you is not easy but it can be just as important.

I wish the best of luck to everyone that suffers from this horrible affliction.

peggytwittypeggytwittyalmost 17 years ago
A wonderful piece of information shared

I don’t normally second post but there are so many good things said in the comment section. First don’t think that you necessarily have to have drugs to fight a depression and get a handle on your life. But for many it is a solution that works very well and as said may not have to be lifelong. Many people need drugs to get a handle on what is going on so they can progress to where they feel they now are making rational decisions. Drugs FOR SOME may be stopped by knowledge, and as said in the comments, by then having a routine that lets life be so much better again.<p>Please get a trained doctor or therapist who can help you find what works for you. No therapist has all the answers as it is with you that you can find answers to what is best for you alone. Changing therapist may be a great, no it is important idea after a time. You get more feed back from different points of view. I tell you a reality that is not known by all. Any good therapist will talk over his more demanding cases with a colleague, or hopefully colleagues, and get a view point that may help the client. This is ALWAYS DONE NAMELESSLY. Please remember that there are new approaches to different forms of depression being administered all the time. No one has a cookie cutter solution for depression and some therapist are specialized (I know what isn’t specialized these days) in varying types of depression. No therapist can cure you, you will be the one to put your life back together.<p>The use of many written pieces can be a very good thing. Bear in mind what works for some is not a solution for someone else. There are many contradictory pieces of information out there so don’t let it be an absolute guide for you.<p>Always remember this is a disease not a fault. May God bless all who have the knowledge that they can be helped, be it self-help as that is the ultimate goal.<p>Author, again thank you for such good works. With the highest of regards.<p>PT

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
no meds too soon

My only worry is starting medication so quickly. I think the doctor & therapist should come first and consult together. I don't believe in our quick fix pop a pill for anything society. Maybe necessary sometimes, but would be a last resort for me personally. Excellent piece. Thanks for your writing!

Selena_KittSelena_Kittalmost 17 years ago
Good luck

I'm sorry you experienced it. Good luck in the contest!

SxRxSxRxalmost 17 years ago
On the road to recovery

A very courageous and personal 'how to' about your own journey through depression and leaving sign posts and directions for others. Several thoughts: Many depressives have major life events that will trigger an episode of major depression - you apparently discovered one of the most common, that of post partum. There are certainly others, surviving a major heart attack, death of a loved one and the list goes on. Most important is that you keep yourself in tune with how your are truly feeling and behaving. Writing this essay is another sign of your recovery. Bravo!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
Brave

It was brave of you to write this piece. Depression is frightening and carries a certain stigma. The world is full of idiots like Mr. Cruise who have no idea what they are talking about but think they know the answer. Clearly you struck a nerve, Emerald. Thanks for writing. Good luck in the contest.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
What is more important, life or sex

I have been suffering with a form of depression called "Cyclethemia"(not sure of the spelling) almost all my life. I have been on CELEXA and it works very well, except after taking it for a few years I began to lose all my sex drive. I discontinued taking the drug, but now I have decided to start taking the drug as I feel that at my age (59) I would rather feel good and treat everyone good rather than worry about being able the want sex.

SwellBabyGirlSwellBabyGirlalmost 17 years ago
U R wonderful

Dear Emerald Dragon, I agree u were very brave to write this piece. I too have suffered and at times been a bad mom ços of depression. (That hurts the worst, the bad mom part.) I applaud u for giving this illness the airtime it deserves. Im happy for you that u found the right balance of meds etc. Thanks for your great writing and good luck! XXX

BOSTONFICTIONWRITERBOSTONFICTIONWRITERalmost 17 years ago
Now, I'm depressed

Okay, I'm depressed after reading about depression. Just kidding.

Most people still do not seek help until it is too late.

I had a boss once who was on medication Zoloft, and then took himself off without consulting his doctor. Well, a few days later he shot and killed two of his partners in my office. Luckily, I was not there. True story.

He was the nicest guy, too. You just never know.

Good job on the story.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
Assured To Go To Heaven

Emerald Dragon,

I'm assured to go to heaven because I spent my time in hell. My depression story is a bit different because I came from a very physically and emotionally abusive childhood. I thought my high school sweetheart was going to be the love of my life but after we married she picked up where my father left off and methodically set about destroying me. She stole 23 years of my life and left me with a loaded rifle against my head when she walked out and into the arms of another man. She was the cause of my depression and I am now on the right meds and regularly see a therapist. The only good things to come out of those 23 years were my two sons. My recovery is slowly turning into the best times of my life and she will reap what she has sewn. My only bitterness is the huge chunk of time that I have lost that I can never recover and that hurts more than anything. My advice to anyone reading this is to please get help as soon as possible and put as much distance between you and the cause of your depression as fast as possible.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
thanks

i have had depression now for a number of months now and I think this article has helped me more than my therapist good luck

jim

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
Loaded subject. Added note to ANON in Ohio

By the way, Manic depression isn't. It is a WHOLE nother can of worms which can have depression, yes, but can also have mania, a very dangerous kind of high (kind of lik being drunk all the time, only without the alcohol).

This is one reason why Prozac (and whatever other drugs you want to fill in here) are not filled over the counter.

And to the guy with no sex drive, I can't possibly say this loud enough.

TRY WELBUTRIN. It regulates the Seratonin without crushing the sex drive.

I admire your courage in picking this topic. Those of us who have faced the dark hole that has no end, however, know that sometimes no combination of drugs or therapy can help. Sometimes it is just a matter of letting the body and/ or brain heal.

There will come a time when it does. Trust me, I have been to the bottom of the hole, fought my way to almost ou, fell back in and clawed my way back out again.

I ain't going back in there again.

WhiteWave48WhiteWave48almost 17 years ago
Impassioned

An impassioned account of a very real problem for so many. Thanks for sharing Emerald. Such clear advice to those immobilized by this condition. Everyone seems to be putting in their 2c worth, so here's mine as there are so many causes of depression. For myself, I found nutritional solutions for a genetic version of depression brought on by certain food sensitivities.

Tink4FairyTink4Fairyalmost 17 years ago
Meds anyone?

I sympahtize with those who have depression, but I think meds are way too overprescribed in our society, and depression is misdiagnosed all too often, unfortunately. :(

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
Re: Some really stupid comments

The author is talking about MAJOR depression, not the occasional sadness that most people experience. If you've ever actually experienced MAJOR depression, you'd realize that self help or talk therapy are all but useless against the depression. (They ARE useful as adjunct therapies for straightening out the messed up lives left after the depression lifts.) Realize that many who suffer from MAJOR depression are too depressed to even recognize their problem as depression. How does one think their way out of their depression when their very thought processes have gone haywire? (I suppose that one could compare that aspect of major depression to being drunk. Imagine having a few six-packs and then trying to make sense out of some self-help book!) Main point: If your life seems to be going completely to hell all around you, GET HELP! DON'T try to fix it all by yourself. Thanks to the author for sharing her suggestions.

smegger_29smegger_29almost 17 years ago
Bravo

Very good piece, very informative to myself. I found it echoing my own life, I seem to get frustrated with everything these days and snap at some of the slightest things and brood about it for weeks afterwards. I think I've either got serious anger issues or depression. Niether is an answer i like :(

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
Rage On, For You Are Mighty.

I have been, and likely will always be, suffering from a many number of things. I can't tell you exactly what because I've never seen a doctor and I likely never will unless perhaps this health care issue in the states pushes through. It's very hard to even see the world itself for what it is when everything is blurred around you. The world isn't always a wonderful place and there are people out there just waiting to take advantage of your weakness. I learned this the hard way because even after I made it out of my both physically and mentally abusive situation(s) I still continued to be hurt, used, and treated unfairly by other people. I don't fault them on it because I realized that they were just like I was. Their world, too, was completely distorted just like mine was. The problem therein lies in that people don't honestly know what to do for themselves and to that end I think these little guides, or any word-of-mouth format, are absolutely necessary to let these people know that they are not alone because I can tell you from experience that when you are in such a severe state of depression you feel like you are the only person in the world even if someone may attempt to understand, you ask yourself; "Do they really?" I think it's important we keep reciting to ourselves, and those so unfairly tormented, that there are others out there that understand. The problem lies in that some so-called "therapists" and "counselors" who think they have any clue what-so-ever about the conditions from which severe depression arrises from. They have no idea at all. Until we learn to pinpoint the causes of these problems in our society they will continue to exist. Physical and Mental Domestic Abuse DOES EXIST AND DOES HAPPEN. Make no mistake about it that there are those of us in society who think that it does not happen. To make things worse, when left untreated, a person with any number of depressive states-of-mind can in turn effect the people who will come to love them. When left untreated any number of these very deep passions can cause a chaotic spiral that can lead to further depression or suicide; not only for the depressed but for those few others also. Because it is depression you cannot put a number or a label on it to scale how bad it is. Society will always feel the weight of those she ignores. People will continue to suffer until society, as a whole, learns to accept that depression is real, and not just a marketting scheme.

There are many things in this life that have caused me a great deal of suffering that could have otherwise been easily avoided if someone simply gave a damn.

MilliemoonMilliemoonalmost 17 years ago
Very Good

This is very informative but there is a light touch to it that draws the reader in and makes them keep on reading. It is obvious the writer knows what she is talking about and as a fellow sufferer I am glad to know others feel like I do.

AnonymousAnonymousover 16 years ago
Thankyou

Thankyou for sharing your experiences. As a fellow sufferer I can identify with much that you have written about. You are certainly right about the withdrawal symptoms from missing one's meds. I have been off mine (forgot to renew my prescription) for 3 days now and I can truly say that it one of the worst feelings I have ever had (only adult chickenpox has been worse). Thanks again and God bless you.

Michael

samikinssamikinsabout 15 years ago
Too true

Thanks for putting this on here. There are so many of us that have depression. Too often people think that it is a one time deal that will go away and then just like that you never have it again. But there are folks like me out there that will have to fight with this for the rest of my life. Its hard more often than not but the struggle to get better is worth it. I had a friend kill herself last year- took a shotgun and blew off the top of her head. She left behind a family that loved her, and more people than she knew who loved and miss her everyday. She and so many others that have ended their lives are the reason that I fight, that all of us out there fight, everyday to keep going.

So thank you and God bless.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 14 years ago
meh

I am a young person who has been left behind many times in social situations and relationships (why do you think i am reading porn at 22?), many times in my life i have felt alone and thought "what's the point, why go on?"

well guess what, i didn't commit suicide. it's hard, but that's life. man up, you're not special, and it's highly likely that no one will remember you in 100 years. 200 certainly.

do what makes you happy, don't conform to the perfect american image or try to be a perfect parent. failing that, take some responsibility and BE UNHAPPY. no one said you'd be able to find joy every day of your life, no one does that.

medication is hugely oversubscribed in this country. if you want to change yourself to be a different person than who you were born as, fine. just keep in mind that's not who you are.

signed,

one dissenter in a sea of (seemingly 100%) medicated commenters

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
To the writer of "meh"

I hate to sound condescending, but just because you are managing without medication does not mean that those who are on medication don't need it.

Take me for example... I could win the lottery, my daughter could be the perfect angel for a month, my husband could surprise me with the most romantic evening of my life (all at the same time even)... and if I weren't medicated, it would only help a little. No matter how perfect my life is, something is screwy with the chemicals in my head. Off my medicine I am laying in bed, staring at the wall. I would never, could never kill myself (a friend doing so is one of the things that wreaked havoc on my brain in the first place). Even so, unmedicated I can't even leave the house... merely going to the store can send me into a panic attack. It isn't logical, it isn't reasonable, I can't just suck it up when every action takes all of my will. I went to counseling and have resolved many of my issues, I took it as far as I could without medication.

Please, please, please don't look at those of us who need medication as weak or less than you... that would be like looking at someone in a wheel chair and scoffing at them for their inability to walk. I agree that there are some who are medicated without need or without the proper therapy to help with underlying problems. I am not one of them... I tried being off my medication to see if I still needed it. Within a week or two I was back to laying in bed, staring at the wall, trying to gather the will to move.

I applaud your ability to cope with life, I respect the work it takes to do so. Hopefully this will help you (and any other doubters who come along) to understand at least a little why for some people medicating isn't a choice, it is a matter of survival.

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
Right on!

Get help. No medals for trying to gut depression out. The drugs can save your life. Literally.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago

I've had the worst bout of depression now for eight months. The meds I'm on havent' done a thing. I am, as one other commenter said, lying in bed and staring at the wall. It's not like I want to be this way either, but it's knocked me out. I don't know what to do. My family knows but they're far away and I don't like to burden them with my probelms. I guess I'll figure it out one day but for now it truly sucks.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
psychologists:

2 part comment.

1. My GP doctor explained that the drugs are only half of the treatment, and actually the 'crutch' half of the treatment -that (in my own words) without dealing with my mis-wired brain, the drugs would only ever be a bandaid holding my wound together.

2. If at first you don't succeed, try and try again! Try different KINDS of psychologists, psychiatrists, social workers etc.

I went to 6, yep, SIX different psychologists before I clicked with one finally. I was seeing her for a few years when a chance appointment with a social worker showed me that you didn't need a piece of paper in psychology to get the message across even better -in other words, this social worker clicked with me even more than the great psychologist!

ashholeashholeover 12 years ago
just a quick note

i find one thing that doesn't help is keeping your feelings bottled up inside, i used to do that all the time until it came to the point where i basically felt nothing at all, no happiness; joy, sadness, nothing. i felt that just releasing everything every now and again helped, by that i dont mean keeping it bottled up and unleashing every few weeks, i mean maybe in bed at night or when you're with someone who understands. so basically even if it seems to be the right thing to do at the time just dont keep your feelings to yourself.

Scotsman69Scotsman69over 12 years ago
Thanks for airing this.

I sometimes feel that nobody in my life, including my children, has any understanding of where I am. I've been depressive on and off for nearly thirty years, but recently it's been permanent.

It certainly doesn't help my writing...

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
this is horseshit

Chemical imbalances have multiple cures, and medication should be a last resort. This new lifestyle is not suitable for a body adapted to life as it was so many a year ago.

What I recomnend:

Diet + Excersize

You are what you eat. Running releases endorphins. A body who is working on health improvement could be nothing but happy with himself

Figure out cause of depression

Acknowledgement is key. A lot of the time it is something repressed (or not). Seek therapy/psychie help.

Meditate

A buddha meditates in hopes of one day achieving enlightenment/nirvana: A permanent state of mind in which the beholder finds happiness in all aspects of life.

Medication? what the ****. The problem is still there. Unless the cause for chemical imbalances is genetics, (which, by the way, meditation can still fix) medication is should be a last resort. You can't say it's genetics because it could be something supressed. Even if you're sure of yourself!

This response comes from a teenage drug abuser: I found out I abused because I saught after making my brain happy. My 'addictions' diminished after I learned how to self-produce Serotonin, meditation.

flgffs36idtuoathdwm

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago
survivor

I have survived serious deprssion (by which I mean I was in the bath, with the knife touching my wrist), and am now a neuroscientist, I would like to point out some things. First, medication and therapy together work much better than either one alone. Second, we have no idea why. We do not know what causes depression, what its physiology is, or even what it effects. We have no real idea how SSRIs work (seritonin itself does not seem to effect mood), but we know they do. The bottom line is this: no one actually knows how to cure it, but there are a lot of things that can help survive it. This subission is excellent because it covers a lot of them.

And to anyone who still strugles (like I do) with depression: don't lose hope, and you are not alone.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 12 years ago

I have suffered depression for over 20 years. I have been assaulted and suffer PTSD causd by someone who "Loved me". He loved me so much he killed himself when I divorced him. I have been on every medication out there and seen multiple counselors and psychiatrists. One counselor blamed me for my husband's suicide, yes seriously. When on two diff occasioans I told psychiatrists I was suicidal on the medications they told me it wasn't their fault if I killed myself. The newest thinks I don't have depression I have ADHD. I suffer. It destroys me with intimacy. I have a supportive wonderful husband and beautiful children which keep me alive. I survive by holding it in and telling myself I could not hurt my kids by leaving them. I want to see them grow up.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
Fighting for years

Wife doesn't get it. So lonely

littlebittyjetlittlebittyjetabout 11 years ago
Great article!

Thanks for writing this! I applaud your courage and honesty.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
You Understand...

I've been suffering from depression for the last eight years mixed with another disorder that causes seizures. I've been referred to as lazy, a hypercondriac, dramatic and other offensive titles. Very few people see depression as a medical condition, they think it's an excuse to get out of being responsible. I didn't choose to stop living my life, it seemed as if something took my will to push forward and my ability to cope. Not that I want anyone to go through what I went through its good to know someone else understands.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 9 years ago
Been there.

Been there, most of my life. Youa are so right about making sure the ones that stuck with you and supported you are appreciated. My poor wife has been by my side for 37 years, don't know why, I would have dumped me a long time ago.

The most important thing is that people must get past the stigma of mental health diseases and be open to talk to anyone that will listen.

Keep helping people Dragon.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Damned useful

A most helpful guide, for which many thanks.

HP

Anonymous
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