by Isopropyl
I like the premise of the story, but the quick-and-dirty nature of the story and the almost total lack of description really killed it. You really need to take your time and make the sex scenes really hot.
Only a child could possibly fall for the, "You need your breast rubbed" and "special hormones," crap. Plus the story had no build-up and is in need of editing. Thanks for the post, but...
Brook is not overly bright. Sometimes I wonder how she finds her way home without getting loss.
"It's Tom, your brother."
Try lost in lieu of loss different words different meanings. It's Tom your brother. maybe she know hundreds of Toms that she might expect to know on her bedroom door, so he would need the second part of ID. Both room temp IQ in an Igloo.
If you're that serious about criticizing, post your name to your comments and we will go read your shit! Not every story has to be intricately written and 4 pages long. I thought it was a good quick read for the man/woman on the go. Also, he explained how she fell for the silly suggestions.
Great story!! I wish I had a sister like her.. I happen to love women with small tits. They are constantly horney and a great partner in bed..
Doing this is very likely going to lead to her having quite big tits.
Sick. A brother taking advantage of a sister who is not intelligent enough to understand what is being done to her is the lowest.
Look, you either shake your head or you nod it. A shake means no, a nod means yes. You can't "shake your head yes" - that is flat out nonsense.
crazy...like a fox!
great story...regardless whether she shook or nodded her head!