All Comments on 'Manipulating Jenny Ch. 01'

by BeamMeUp

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  • 4 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
HOT !

Great start - can't wait for more.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
Hot topic, hot girl

but your grammar and use of tense needs help. A good concept and lots of sexiness, but you should get someone to help you with editing for easier reading and flow.

sexysmilesexysmileover 15 years ago
Hot

but needs editing. And since Jenny is clearly a she, she's a Latina, not Latino. Off to read chapter 2!

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
too hot!

it was very hot....write more

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