your story is interesting enough, but a little long winded...she is supposed to be telling this to her family...you been thru 4 chaps and still have a long way to go...why dont you condense your chapters and double them up...otherwise you're going to lose a lot of readers...your chapters are a lot shorter than most authors...
Love the emotion that comes through your character. Just found this story today and I can't wait for the rest of the story to be posted! Terrific writing! You pull the reader into the story! Don't change a thing!
i like the pace of the story. if you have it written in full, why not combine the chapters to make them longer? regular submissions would be nice too. thanks for the update.
This is a very good story. You have my interest.
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