All Comments on 'The Shower'

I think you need to slow the pace of this story up, it seems way too rushed. Maybe you should build up some lust between the mom and the visiting friend?

This story would have been better if (1) actual dialogue replaced descriptions of dialogue, (2) the build-up had been slower, setting the "psychological stage" and escalating suspense, and (3) more and more-vivid descriptions had been provided.

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Thanks for your story.

Definitely needs a second part that could include a threesome with the son