All Comments on 'Guide To Having An Affair With A Married Man'

by soncurious

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  • 13 Comments
great lovergreat loverover 15 years ago
That's interesting.

Interesting info, but not useful to me. now someone needs to write a "How to" on married women. :)

AnonymousAnonymousover 15 years ago
Sounds like some cunt got used!

SOunds like someone got used, again no less. Typical of a woman wanting to get back at a married woman for not being able to secure a life long partner of her own. I guess you took the term spread em if you got em to heart. Stop thinking with your twat and get paid for the sex, whore.

AnonymousAnonymousover 15 years ago
It Hurts

Sounds like you were hit with a back-boneless repeater cheater. Guess what honey, it works both ways. I know as I lost a so-called friend to my former wife.

AnonymousAnonymousover 15 years ago
Good Job

Good job...this one makes you think. I've been involved similarly (married woman) and I can relate.

Alvaron53Alvaron53over 15 years ago
Great insights

I very much appreciated the discussion on deception in the affair. Thank you for a fine essay.

AnonymousAnonymousover 15 years ago
Where was the humor?

This was listed as humorous and all it was was pathetic.

Try the one where the cheater tells the person to commit suicide or the spouse's lawyer drags you into court and plasters your name all over the news.

What you described was not an affair. It was using a woman as a cum dump.

oscuro_fuerzaoscuro_fuerzaover 15 years ago
I can relate...

...and I do see the humour in your little essay. I was involved in a cheating experience and I remember the excitement--and the guilt. It's all highs and lows. I never want to be there again--the great highs were not worth the lows.

It really does sound like this guy was trying to have his cake and eat it too--which never works. Not fair to you in the end. Hope it becomes just a bittersweet part of your past as it did for me.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 15 years ago
Why would you punish the wife?

Why would you feel like you need to punish the wife when you are already sleeping with her husband? She hasn't wronged you, YOU are the one ruining her life. Don't you see how awful that is not just for you, but for her as well?

Maybe one day you will get married and the hussy next door will fuck your husband while you're away at work sustaining your family. Shame on you.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 14 years ago
Quit being assholes

She should not feel shamed for their affair. *She* had nothing to honor in their relationship. *She* was not making the active decision to cheat. *She* did not steal the guy from his wife. *She* didn't do anything legitimately wrong. The "punishment to her wife" that she was discussing was, i believe, the fact that the wife got to marry the man that she loved. She wasn't just trying to be an ass with blind maliciousness. The two women (i can't know for sure, but it'd have to be women) who made bitter comments insulting the author need to get over the fact that *they* couldn't keep *their* men satisfied and just see this as a story to read and learn from. It was sour humor. Quit being assholes.

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
Useful

I am currently in the exact situation. My lover is somewhat older than me and his wife is friends with my boss. I don't feel guilty about him being married, probably because i have never met her. This has been going on for some months now and i just can't seem to stop. I am single and a free woman and honestly enjoy his attention. I know he lies and i know he will always go back to his wife, but i can't help it. I'm NOT in love with him, i just purely enjoy the sex and excitement.

I will keep this in my mind and constantly come back to it to remind myself it isn't a relationship, this isn't love, he still has a wife, it is just fun, passionate, wild, invigorating sex. Nothing more, nothing less. Thank you for reminding me of that fact.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago
The funny part

I love the part where you two are climbing in and out of windows to visit and the neighbors see. That is high hilarity! The neighbors must still be telling that one at parties! Are you two 12 or are you 13?

AnonymousAnonymousabout 7 years ago
Affairs are a different kind of animal

The positive thing about an affair is that the sex is usually pretty spectacular. That probably because there are a lot of issues in the marriage and it is express in the sex or lack of sex between the couples. A lot of the time the affair is about the sex mostly. It is probably not about you or the other person per se. It’s about the sex and touching.

The affair may appear to be a relationship, but it is not a relationship. She's got kid and family to consider and in the hierarchy of things, you aren't number one most of the time. If you are married, be honest, she isn't number one either. However, if you are dealing with a difficult spouse, it is nice to be with someone who appears to be pleasant and the sex is good.

With that said, one things that stuck out in this is that it is wise if you are skeptical about what they say. Not to put them down but there is an overall pattern of deception to the person on a lot of levels. I'm not sure what that is about with them but have heard this from other people. It is not a man thing or woman thing, they both do particularly if they have had previous affairs or brief encounters. The woman I was having an affair with lied about everything. Years later I would run into people who knew her and they tell me stories that were completely different than what she told me. I'm not saying not to trust them but don't be surprised if things don't add up. They probably won't. If they are going to violate a trust with their spouse they will violate it with you. Keep in mind if they have a religious background, the more dishonest they maybe.

The stories about how bad the spouse is true and you should probably ignore then about it. If they were that bad they would be divorced or in counseling. They aren't usually. The story is never one-sided, too. Everyone contributes to the soup. If you are lucky to meet the spouse under good circumstances, you'll probably find they are decent people. Hate to say this but some people have sex out side of their marriage just to punish their spouse for one thing or another and are looking for more justification for the affair.

Which gets me back to the first point, it’s about the sex! If you and your other significant other go into it with that in mind, it will make it easier but keep in mind people aren’t robots. If you share orgasms a lot with another, you start to bond.

Liked the part about getting even with wife because it is not good to bring your lover to your home for whatever reason. Those earring left at the scene of the crime or panties that don’t fit your wife found in the laundry basket can make for an interesting few weeks. Luckily my daughter stepped forward and said they were her, though, she wanted a new car for her birthday the following month. Ouch! Bringing her home is a big risk and all it takes is a neighbor to ask your wife or girlfriend who it was you brought home one night who stayed over and you are cooked.

If you do bring them home, never ever use the master bedroom for sex. As I said, there is so much to go wrong that way if she leaves an earring or bra or you have stained sheets. It will piss your wife off no end if you use her bed and she finds out. Use a guest bedroom and bathroom. Pick a time when your wife will be away for a few days at least. Wash the sheets, change out the towels, vacuum and like the writer suggested, let it have time to dry. If you are a guy, go to her place because if she is in charge of cleaning there will be less of a problem. Best is to find a neutral third place like a friend’s house or apartment. Not so thrilled with hotel or motels because they want credit cards over cash.

JollyrogeringJollyrogeringover 2 years ago

I think this is a very truthful story. I am (was) in an affair with a wonderful widow. We have a mutual need for each other - some of the reasons were stated in your essay. I'm not a 'user' andy more than she is a 'user'.... we both set that out at the beginning. After a year of enjoying each other, she decided it was too hard on her heart (same problem as you had) and asked to stop. I had difficulty agreeing and I used some 'logic' to try to persuade her otherwise. She gave in once for a few months (all during the year). However, I could see that it wasn't in her nature to try to take a man away from his wife and I couldn't be there for her when she wanted/needed me (for emotional support). So, we decided to just be friends. We can now say we love each other as friends and not feel guilty about it as lovers would. No, my wife never accused me of cheating - partly because I had given her a choice of whether she wanted me as a sexual being or not (she had been withholding sex from me). I simply told her that if she continued that I would find someone else to enjoy sex with. If it wasn't for our consciences and the need to still sneak around (keeping up appearances), it would have been a lovely arrangement. No, I didn't sneak in and out of her place. I walked in as if I was visiting a friend - which I was.

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