All Comments on 'Claiming Vengence'

Not bad for a first non-consent story. They're difficult to write if you're not completely comfortable with the subject matter.

Not bad at all, I hope to see more like this from you, you have a great idea and would make a great series line.

Hi, loved the story, short and too the point i could have read more, it was very good! Loved the Asian co ed girl and love to hear more about her :)

I usually like stories thats are a bit longer but I enjoyed this one and don't have any criticism. Good job.

... if its a first keep trying ;)

it was a good start! You could have it longer !!! And with the girl condition : he could have had more details on her anatomy.

Thanks anyway

Good writing, the setup is nice. The action needs more details, take your time to install a good mood, to induce the feeling of the moment. The girl could have stayed a little bit more awaken. She likes Billy so... no problems there. I like what you write but I would love it with more details, more point of view. Example: Describe the action that Jared lives in details then describe the action from a 'god' point of view to fluff it up, to build more over what takes place.

it was okay but lacked detail....

...great story...just to add to humiliation and revenge after dressing her back up...piss all over her knickers..so she thinks shes peed herself...and for when her freinds find her.ha.x

Good enough story, one editing Detail…..the fence was slowly not slowing