by WimborneMale1978
Sex scene was far too rushed, and there was little foreplay. Needed to be padded out a bit.
Great to read a story that is local to me, I hope that you are going to continue writing like this, even add to this one and maybe make the stories longer. This is a story that has realism unlike many others and does not have the numerous mistakes that makes others a pain to read. Keep it up.
Aunt Sue Got Things Going and Then It Was His Time! Great Story!
A fantasy fulfilled, it does need more, maybe Katie too. A proof reader would help raise it to a 5