Nice work, dear author--you've captured the "dangerous obsessive romance" aspect of the song. Quite a thrilling little vignette; thanks for sharing it with us.
I'm a Veteran of the Iraq war and former Marine. To my Band of Brothers keep up the fight and remember there is life beyond the Corps. Love your time in it'll be the best time of your life. I love anything extreme and my mailbox being filled to the brim with feedback.