by meplusyouu
Please proofread before submitting. Other than that, my dick started to get hard. Just started.
Loved your story. It was simple & sweet. Good first attempt. In your nest story add in more sex. Waiting t read more from you All the best
I'm So Wett My Panties Are Soaked. Please Continue i Need To "CUM" Too ! - Kisses
A very good start! The only criticism is that you need to have someone proof your submission. I am looking forward to your next tale.
I liked it a lot, and it heated me up. I agree with others on the proofing observation, in fact, editing may be what you need - it goes beyond what spell-check can do - basically a second pair of eyes that sees things the author usually can't.
I'm looking forward to chapter 2!