I read this about ten times and couldn't get the meaning. I can see there is a juxtaposition going on but I can't make the leap. I think the problem is that by definition a totem pole is carved. I have no problem with the writing. Lucid but economical, what I like to see.
I have no problem with the totem pole having no carvings of god and the second statement is also true but I can't get where or why the two of them meet
and yes, like an everyone else, I too have an asshole. To me this poem says something about wealth and honesty. Nature being outside, feeling the honesty of the rain. The nudity of the people who made them in respect to their not being corrupted by the hypocrisy of religion. And in temples, fed by wealth, and gild and lies, the statues stand on pedestals, out of reach, (morally and immorally), to those who venture in.
This goes in my favorites list....
I am more inclined to agree with vr and uys than maria. what this does it relies on the reader to fill in the gap between the two images, true there is a similarity in the images...
but this reminds me a little of the stanley fish experiment (you can google)
I wasn't aware I was making comments for others to agree with. That being said, I still like your poem and it still means what it meant to me the first time I read it. At least you got people reading it and making comments that is a good thing :)
I meant to add this. One thing that I would change is the word "stay" to remain. You would have a little internal rhyme there which would kinda nice, but that is just superficial anyway. keep writing!
ps, TY for the note.
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