All Comments on 'Redemption Ch. 02'

He deserves public castration. What he did to her, he should suffer as well for the same length of time.

Glad that you are going to continue the story despite all the harsh comments. I am very interested in seeing where the story will go and how everything will end.

This is sadism. But she isn't the only one being tortured. So is the grammar. You need an editor. Also, you are sloppy with the POV and who is saying what. Their actions don't make sense. They started out with him rescuing her from a tough life. Why did he start abusing her? Why did she start acting like a bitch? You can't just write whatever you want, it has to all fit together. All I see is an insanely angry man abusing a terrified pregnant woman. It's not erotic or even interesting.

In her note when she left, she says she's 3 months pregnant. You start the second chapter saying "6 months later..." That would make it just about her due date. Yet when he finds her, you comment that she's barely showing at 6 months along.

An editor would really help, though I'm glad he is at least starting to realize what a complete and total insanely abusive ass he's been.

Do you plan to continue with this? It's good, and you should!

$5000 only for her servicing countless of Jay's pals on his demand?!;))Jay isn't man enough for keeping whores even...it seems....or worth being serviced by them!!;))

as per your previous chapter...making her go through serial anal gangbangs when she was 3 months preg....whipping her then..and throwing her out of the house....only to come back to her to retrieve a $3000 she wrote confessing to have taken and to return later after starting a new life far away...!!

And if Jay does not believe in helping her through a preg..coz she was his whore....why does he mention DNA tests and all to know if the baby is his?!.;)) whats the bloody point?! ;))

Really writer!! ;)) your chapter 1& 2 did not come across to me as even an iota of 'redemption'.....rather....a free tour of the 9 hells replayed a billion times over!!;))Would you kindly drop the good bible word from the title of your series?! it reeks over-pretence!! ;))