All Comments on 'Valentine Treat: WhoreWife Creampie'

by AverageBear

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  • 55 Comments
chytownchytownabout 12 years ago
They Had!!!

A very happy Valentine Treat. Good read although I think the sex should have been hotter after all it is a Valentine story. Thanks for sharing.

betrayedbylovebetrayedbyloveabout 12 years ago
Bad

I'm not offended by your story. I just thought it was lousy. 1 star. Just one man's opinion.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago
Worse than bad..sickening.

What hole do these sick authors crawl out of? For one thing for sure, the hole leads from a cess pool.

ginrunnerxginrunnerxabout 12 years ago
interesting

Had me pissed from the word GO, then i got mad when you had him get horny by watching, i thought, here we go again another wimp who likes to see his wife with another man, then i was surprised when you showed it was him and his wife...lol...good read, well done and thanks ...Bob

toomuchinmyheadtoomuchinmyheadabout 12 years ago
not perfect, but no bad

I enjoyed the twist, that it was them in the video. I good story idea, but i thought the execution could have been better.

Of course, I'm not as indignant as the Anon who pretends to be offended when spending his time reading dirty stories.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago
Clever

Nice set up, and execution. Role playing. Good job. It may get bashed, but it was a fun read. The diclaimer at the beginning sort of gave it away.

More.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago
Score one for the author!

Looks like author took what he knew of LW readers worst bashing and wove thm into a clever rebuttal. Good loving wife, very good story. Knew this author usu writes about loving relationships, so was surprised to see title, but now I understand.

Huedogg2Huedogg2about 12 years ago
It was different, I'll give you that

I gave it a 3, but next time just sent up a tri-pod in the closet

cullodencullodenabout 12 years ago
Good fun

I enjoyed the story. Decently written, fun plot twist, good idea inspiration for couples. A camera on a tripod wouldn't have been as hot. Thanks for putting it out there. As to the no-talent, cowardly, needle dick Anonymous, fuck him.

UndrApprctdUndrApprctdabout 12 years ago
There's nothing "light-hearted"

about making your wife a whore to get your rocks off. It's one thing to want to see your wife with another man, but tough to imagine a guy would want to prostitute his loving wife. What would you do next when that thrill wore off? You'd probably have to create a new category for that one.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago
very unexciting... but I loved the novelty and cultural appreciation

gee whiz, wish I had conceived the plot line. cuckholding the self shows great dimension of character. However since you lead us to believe your straight laced wife has exceeded expectations; you might want to explore one of two avenues.

A) through 16 years you had not traveled that path, and she saw fit to leave you blissfully ignorant of her controlling other side. or B) the excitement and high of the evening opens the door for fireworks on the fourth or new twists for the 17th valentine shared.

EspressoBolusEspressoBolusabout 12 years ago
Some comments funny

Apparently some cannot understand what they read. Still, I was not impressed with the story.

njlaurennjlaurenabout 12 years ago
jeez

Don't some of the commenters read,he didn't whore his wife out,they role played eith each other! What,a hubby and wife are only supposed to have catholic sex,in the dark in the missionary position to make babies? Ironically it shows a couple in love expressing that love through play and the author gets it! For.yhe author I liked it,nice change from dull stories featuring bitch wives,wimp husbands and so forth....very hot,too

Saxon_HartSaxon_Hartabout 12 years ago
three stars

I almost skipped to the vote to give you a 1. I would have given more if he hadn't sucked his wad out of her. That's gay. But I was happy to see she wasn't a cheating whore.

Mostera1Mostera1about 12 years ago
Nice Twist

Although predictable based on the warning, it was an enjoyable read. A good TLW, just what this volatile category needs more of.

Thank you!

M1

amfaxamfaxabout 12 years ago
Save your money, next time.

I'll videotape it for you for free. Have filmed several couples, a couple of threesomes and three gangbangs.

Would do it for free, for you, or for anyone else that might be interested.

let me know, @yahoo dot com

demantoiddemantoidabout 12 years ago
fun read

Brought a wide grin at the end. Loved the snooping buttinski secretary...added to the tension. Valentines Day, hot wife and Boston Cream Pie...clever clever clever combo.

DunaDunaabout 12 years ago
TLW story

True Loving Wife story =5 stars.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago
Good story

Good story about a loving couple. Gave it a five. Had to reread it because I skimmed it to start with then find it was actually them made me glad and i enjoyed it from then on. There are alot in the loving wives that are actually cheating spouses and thoughs I don't like because that's not loving in the slitest bit.

digdaddyrichdigdaddyrichabout 12 years ago
I admit, I was a burn the bitch guy when I first started reading

But the ending blew me away.

A nice con-job, with a tricky ending.

Thanks for the read

Vulcan_in_OhioVulcan_in_Ohioabout 12 years ago
Fairly original

And pretty well-written. A solid 4, thanks for writing.

cpetecpeteabout 12 years ago
GOT ME!!!

Ha Ha Ha-well done,I fell for it hook, line and sinker!

Fine story!

tazz317tazz317about 12 years ago
A CUCKY WIMP IN LOVE

with 16 years of togetherness. TK U MLJ LV NV

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago
Cream pie?

Sick.

olivemarieolivemarieabout 12 years ago

Great twist :) I also liked learning about little tidbits along the way: like the "no kissing" thing and the difference between R & NC-17 sex.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago
Great twist, even better satire - 5 stars!

You pushed all the right buttons in spoofing the genre. Great concept - and incredibly plausible. Made me want to re-read in light of the ending to better enjoy how I'd been duped. Enjoyable writing style and admirable job of putting yourself in the shoes of the reader to gauge reactions. Max

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 12 years ago
Cute story

Well done. A little unfair given the description of the shock and horror on Rob's part when he is viewing the DVD for the first time. Whose idea was the DVD?

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 12 years ago
nice

nice twist at the end !!!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
I

GUESS.....bill

AnonymousAnonymousabout 11 years ago
Well written and well conceived

My only suggestion is to include more kink. especiallyi with the name you chose. Don't be shy.

But a solid B+.

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
Never saw that one coming

Loved the twist.

impo_60impo_60about 9 years ago
Valentine's Day...

Valentine's Day it's all about this: to a couple show all their love, trust and respect for each other...4*

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Thanks

Great descriptive lead-in and a wonderful ending. Great story!

TornadoTysTornadoTysabout 9 years ago
Good Story

A pleasant read and a very twist in the plot, well done.

It is refreshing to read that this was not another cuckold story.

Drbeamer3333Drbeamer3333about 9 years ago
Enjoyed it

a fun read. Thanks for the offering.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
****

Man, I was calling you every kind of wimp, cuckold, pervert in the World! It was a burn the bitch story in the beginning. Lucky you turned it around and saved your ears from burning. Good writing and last but not least, story. Cheers! c29

rightbankrightbankalmost 9 years ago
I too was starting to get angry with him

then it all spun around. I think the title may have put some potential readers off, but if they didn't read it, it is their loss.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Good twist.

Too bad I killed the wife and put the husband in the wimp garbage pail before I got to the ending. BAH!

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
UGH!!!

You really are a pathetic twit!

AnonymousAnonymousover 5 years ago
Good job

You got me and I loved it!

26thNC26thNCabout 5 years ago
Good story

You got me good. Beginning pissed me off, but you saved it. You can keep the creampie though.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 5 years ago
Ha Ha

Magic! You really had me there. Great twist.

johsunjohsunover 4 years ago
Great twist!

Loved it!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 4 years ago
Great!

Love the twist in the second half. Just GREAT!!!

5

lance_spearmanlance_spearmanabout 4 years ago
Very nicely done

Had me fooled till the very end.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 4 years ago
Nicely done!

Classic technique -- the reader "thinks" he knows what's going on, and then, WHAM! The big surprise ending that twists the plot 180 degrees. Thanks for an entertaining story.

iameaseliameaselalmost 3 years ago

Damned good one!!!

26thNC26thNCover 2 years ago

Again with the twist. Another good story.

Rancher46Rancher46over 2 years ago

Great story with a pleasant twist at the end, from thinking she was having an affair to realizing it was the two of them role playing and loving each other for Valentines Day. Well done! 5 ++ stars

lukeey90lukeey90almost 2 years ago

Not bad..you got me there..but be careful it's starts by eating your own creampie and then one day she'll ask you..."is he taste different than yours hunny" ?

AnonymousAnonymousabout 1 year ago

Good story, but be careful you are on a slippery slope, wifey might find she likes doing movies, especially big cock ones, are you sure you are up for that....

AnonymousAnonymous10 months ago

Lovely story. Keeping fantasy in the marriage.

AnonymousAnonymous8 months ago

Composition issues are all covered quite well according to Writers' Workshop criteria, so kudos on the mechanics of it. Kudos also on the setup--the misdirection was effective, especially since P.I. use is so common in LW stories. The behavior of the MC (husband) played right into the tropes associated with a cuckolded husband, and that of the MC (wife) was so typical a description (in LW stories) of an inhibited wife finally embracing her inner slut and loving the passionate discovery of that so wonderful aspect of being a woman--that SHE carried acceptance of the plot development with such enthusiastic flair that the reader just HAD to accept it at face value.

To find out at the end that this was TRULY a LOVING WIFE'S story in the best sense of that phrase was a delightful surprise, and one which offered a nice counterpoint to the usual unfortunate recitation of "cheating wives' tales".

Damn well done. Loved it. More please.

MLJ

AnonymousAnonymous4 months ago

Did not like that story. 2/5

jopstorm1945

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I enjoy writing tales with memorable characters and a deeper meaning, so if you're just looking for a stroke story, you might look elsewhere. That said, you'll find some pretty hot sex in most of my stories. Reader emails and other forms of feedback are welcome! Best regards,...