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A Casual Game Of Strip Poker

byprivatejoker©
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Comments (9)
by Anonymous

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by Anonymous03/01/12

Revenge?

Good so far and well-written. I see revenge in the tags, but I think the best revenge might just be for Jake to wait until Amy is naked and then just grab his clothers and leave her there. But please continue as it is your story and your work.

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by privatejoker03/01/12

Thank you for your comments. I have submitted Ch.2 to Literotica and hopefully people will like more than this, since it has such a low-score. The next part has a few different twists and turns but is still essentially a story about nudity.

There will be revenge in future Ch's and also raunchier scenes as things heat-up.

Please offer me feedback people as this is the first story I've ever submitted.

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by YDB9503/01/12

Nice, but..

Great setup, interesting characters, but chemistry between them is a problem. I'm not getting why Jake and Amy would be friends in the first place when she's so nasty to him. I do see you trying to address that with her sex appeal, but to me at least that doesn't overcome her attitude and her lack of respect for him.

Otherwise, though, great start. I look forward to future chapters!

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by Anonymous03/01/12

Nice

Really liked it can't wait for part 2

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by privatejoker03/05/12

Chapter 2

Chapter 2 is out now and Ch.3 is nearly finished. Really enjoyed writing this and will hopefully write more. Thanks all for reading and especially for comments and feedback.

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by Anonymous03/19/12

Loose your trousers.

'Loose' and 'lose' are two different words. Please try to learn them and use them correctly.

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by privatejoker03/19/12

Typo.

That was obviously a typo, you tool. Thanks for your incredibly condescending and negative comments. What a surprise it comes from an anon.

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by Anonymous03/28/12

Too many typos

Get an editor, please. I really like the story and the characters and your story telling is great, but there are too many typos and bad spellings!

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by Anonymous11/09/12

There =/= their

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