All Comments on 'My Brother's Invasion'

Definately has some potential, could've been longer but I like what you've got. Would like to see more from these two.

This story definitely needs an encore!!!!!

Thank you all for the comments. More is coming up from these two.

ok no backstory for them. sex in a school library in the middle of the day and noone hears them. he has a friend that turns the lights out for them, does the friend know who he going to be doing and what was the friend promised in return? overall the bad grammar and location a seemingly rapid escalation kinda ruined it for me.

That gave away as soon as his cock entered her because the hymen resides in the opening of the pussy. I can't even imagine two people stripping naked in a public library. This made the story a little difficult to accept. Trying to tell the story of attraction while fucking doesn't work. Yes lust can explain a lot, but the story didn't do it. Also confronting the issue of incest while brother fondles sister is a bit hard to do. This story needs a beginning and reason why the two siblings would have such lustful activities in public, especially for the first encounter. Nice fantasy, bad story; I'm sure a little more consideration of detail could make this a good story.

RS

I'm glad to have read about their first fuck, but it would have been better if he would have waited until he could have had her at home in her own bed, and taken her a little more slowly.

Still a good read, thanks

I wonder where the other patrons and the librarians are while they both strip, he eats her out, gets a blowjob and fucks her, while he and she are both moaning loudly. The lights go out and people scream so they can make as much noise as they want. Then he takes her virginity and fucks her for TWO straight hours. UH-HUH, yeah sure, happens all the time.

... and that's when I couldn't stop laughing at the terrible writing. Sorry, I tried.

The two are passionate. I’m eager to read Part 2.