by Mistress_of_Passion
Not bad. There was some repetition and i think it needs some more details.
That is so unlikely it needs to be explained. Are they actually sibs, or at least know of love they shared with sibs? Or some other reason they accept such non-traditional love? I find myself more interested in such possibilities than in the twins affair.
the spelling sucks bringing the story down what could have been a real good story is now only so-so because of an uncaring writer that refuses to use a good editor before posting. either do it right or not at all go back to grade school and pay attention this time please.
It was the best story I could read...you're really good...I haven't done a story in so long that read everyone else. It just proves you have the creative idea mind, great job
Really hate it when you ain't got the GUTS to I.D. yourself with a BULLSHIT review. Get some Balls and MAN-UP if you GOTTEM!!! Loved the story. Hope more is to Cum, Thanks.
I just wanted to say thank you for all the awesome feedback, I'm really taking your ideas into thought as for the grammar and minor mistakes nobody's perfect show me one person who's perfect being a first time writer to this site. There is definitely more to come in this series and I hope every one enjoys it. If not DON'T bother to read and DON'T bother to comment if it bothers you that much, especially not as anonymous.
You are two for two with this story hope this is going to have alot of chapters cant wait till shes pregnant
This one just got better...Mistress you are improving with each story...but that is what happens when you put yourself out there for the world to read. Pregnancy???
This story is sooo sweet it is great how they came together. Please continue this story a few more chapters because i really want to know where this is going.
Hey mate just commenting on some things like try too proof read 3-4 times, each time trying to spot different things. Next you're perspective of the twins is that it's almost a completely normal thing; but let me tell you, even if both of them have feelings for each other there's still a massive barrier there that makes them think rationally (just pointing it out maybe read a couple of different stories like "My Virgin Sister" or "The Ache of Rapture"). Read these and try too take the meaning of what I've just told you in. All in all there is a lot of potential for great talent, you just have too try and expand on it. Great work for you're second story (yes I know that there is more, and I intend too read them soon). Hopefully you re-visit this post and take the time too read this comment. Yours sincerely (Dr. Talent). Cover name.