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I Haven't Seen You In Years Ch. 02-03

bydreamsex1130©
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by Anonymous

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by dreamsex113006/23/12

From the Author

Hi! I am the author of this series and I would really appreciate some feedback, as I am looking into becoming a published author and unbiased opinions would really be helpful. Thanks guys!!

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by Anonymous06/24/12

better writing 101

Use less 'I' and 'You", and slow the story down.

There is detail there, and substance .. but it needs to flow better.

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by LoneStarRider06/24/12

well....

Better, compared to ch.#1.

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by Anonymous06/24/12

It was a little fast
It almost seemed like you wanted the stories to be finnished ASAP
i know that you didnt mean it but i think each chapter should have SOME dialogue.
So maybe just slow it down(:
~Christina

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by Anonymous06/25/12

Dreamsex1130...if you're looking into becoming a published author, you really need to work on your style, punctuation, grammar etc, and SLOW down. I can guarantee I wouldn't pay for a story that is written the way you have written this, there is no substance in it at all.

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