All Comments on 'Beautiful Corpse'

Very well written, skimped on the ending though.

good but next time more on the end

The bouncing between the two characters is very disconcerting and makes the story disjointed.

Many thanks to all - for reading, voting and commenting.

Just wanted to add a note about the switching back and forth between the lead characters' voices: my goal was to play with the angle of Kara's perception of herself as plain and unattractive (a common insecurity for a girl her age), and be able to juxtapose that with the beautiful reality that Tom sees. If it makes the story disjointed to read, it probably didn't work as I hoped... but do I appreciate the opportunity to try out new things in my writing, and for your feedback.

I loved the way you changed voices.So many times between a boy and a girl they have differant agenders.The girl came over as young at 18 ( sounded more like 16). What you must remember is that girls find out much earler than guys how to minipulat boys and the only way we boys / men can sometimes but not often get the upper hand is if the girls are young and we are not so young.Loved the story would like to see another installment maby with not much sex but how Kara has matuered and found how sexuly inviting she is to men and how she can weeld her power over them.

This is the most twisted...sickest...creepiest thing I've read in a long time...

AND I LOVED IT! OH MY WAS THAT HOT! WOOOOOO!!!!!

Fucking load of rubbish Written by a total wanker