by Ironiclaconic
I really appreciate this story.It's different.I knew the other sister had to come back but I didn't see that ending coming. The plot. characters, and writing is excellent. Kudos
enjoyed your story, really. The ending was a complete surprise., although how else would such partnership end?? Thank you.
Thank you so much for this great piece of writing!
I made the experience that stories with no main characters you can sympathize with are seldom enjoyable, but I'd say you managed to keep it just interesting and short enough to be a really enjoyable read!
I especially enjoyed the twist at the end. While reading I kept thinking that yes, she may be a demon, but this Michael is such a massive prick ... :)
That was a fantastic story. You could probably expand this entire concept into a novel, or at least a novella. LOVED the twist at the end. Well written (found a couple of minor editing issues, but otherwise well crafted), well crafted, and very sexy. The way you wrote the succubus's persona was dead-on. Thanks for writing! 5 stars easy.
You worked it so you could see hints she was somehow playing him on more than one level, nice twist at the end!
So Michael was always Naamah? Or was he sacrificed to bring back Naamah?
Superb succubus story and perfect for Halloween. Best of luck in the contest.
... we could call the contest done right now. We have a winner! Loved it: well plotted, well paced, and hot.
I've been frequenting this site for a few years, and I must say that this is one of the most artfully written submissions I've come across. You had me guessing right up until the end. The subtleties of the plot are expert. By the end, you realize the truth was staring you in the face the whole time. There were a few editing errors in the text, but those are present even in published works. Your story is one of my favorites by far. Well, I'm off to browse through your other submissions...and perhaps work off this blush that's been staining my face since I started reading through your sex scenes... # -_- #
Brilliant, simply bloody brilliant. Best story I've read on this site and I've read quite a few. I'd love too see sequals, or prequels, or maybe alternates, maybe starring a different sister? Regardless, bueatifully written, nailed the teasing succubus persona, and you at least brushed up against every major fetish. Not to mention the actual inclusion of an interesting plot! Hats off to you sir, keep writing, you have a real gift.
By far the best story I have read on this site. The plot was excellent, the characters interesting, and there was just the right amount of sexual action. I enjoyed the digs on banksters as well. I have been working on an Erotic Hypnosis Adventure based on a Succubus visiting you in your dream. This story will greatly enhance my listener's experience ;-) Don't worry, Succubi don't kill you in your dream... but they do make you cum!
Samantha at HypnoErotica.biz
Really fantastic story, Eisheth is quite a fun character. My favorite part is definitely that Abraham Lincoln pretty much killed a succubus apparently.
Dark and disturbing... See if I trust any really, really attractive women again!