All Comments on 'A Good Kind of Scare'

Loved your story and the build up. Looking forward to your other stories.

Not too short and very Arousing.

Well Done!

Great story line. I enjoyed it very much; keep on writing.

You did a pretty good for a first work. Your story development was smooth and continuous. Proof reading should have picked up the line "buck up against her ass as she GRINDED my own." That gem was followed shortly by, "She lifted her hand and stuck her FIGURE in her mouth." These are errors that spell checkers miss (especially Microsoft),but just reading the piece should have had you stumbling over those sentences. especially the switch of figure for fingers.

DON'T QUIT WRITING! JUST SHOW A LITTLE PRIDE IN YOUR WORK AND MAKE THE EFFORT TO GET IT RIGHT!

I gave you high marks for the effort, my criticism is meant to improve you, NOT a kiss of death. PLEASE, write on!

A nice storyline with good character build and erotic scenes.

Well done!

Thanks for the read...

a little slow to develop but well written and interesting. some of the transitions were a little quick, like Teddy just blurting out that he wanted to fuck his mother, but overall the story flowed and had likeable characters.

I thought the build up was actually pretty good. However, the payoff at the end was disappointing. Work on the sex. I look forward to your next submission.

I can't wait for a follow up to this....

...but spoilt by some pretty vague spelling. The word you had as "peeked" is actually spelt "piqued". You had "dawning" where you meant "donning" and the appalling non-word "grinded" where you meant "ground".

Apart from the likes of the above, a good story.

Would like very much to read more. Not the usual approach to incest stories at all, that was very good. As some of the other posts said there are ways to make the story more readable, but the story itself is one of the best of this type I have read. Don't let the criticism of those who won't even leave their names discourage you. Please keep writing and thank you for your story.

I would like to thank everyone for each of your comments. I know this piece could be better. To be honest, I rushed and it shows. This is my first attempt at a story of this nature and the closer I got to completion, the more so I wanted to post it. I wish I would've re-read it before submitting or consulted an editor (as I do with my normal projects). I will continue writing with the notes from your criticisms. Again, thank you.

An equal opportunity incest Mom.

it wasn't difficult for me to picture myself, my older sister kathy and my mother gladys in this story. i loved how truly nasty the mother was. well done.

Well, for what it is (MEANINGLESS PHRASE!!!!)

She still had the same brunette hair with soft curls and even though she definitely didn't look over 25 (POINTLESS!!!!)

counter attack (WHAT IS HE COUNTERING????)

peeked (piqued)

I couldn't bare it anymore (bear)

guess with himself (CONFUSING!!!!)

pajama'd leg (REALLY????)

grinded (ground)

figure in her mouth (finger)

collar bone (collarbone)

I wait at the door (waited)

pace quicken (quickened)

on the (bed) above me

Holiday (holiday)

That was fantastic!

a pair of tits is suppose to scare the shit out of a guy??? a vagina has NO lips, it's a tube that normally can't be seen. who is the idiot that called a pussy a vagina??? shoot the whore please!!! I guess getting the shit fucked out of him scared him for life??? otherwise nice story about a few scum of the earth people. stay clear of STD zone with these people...

Seeing as this is over 8 years old I don't know if the author will see this comment but I wanted to say that this was a great lesbian work. The male/female sex on the other hand was barely there and disappointing after all the buildup. You barely had any dialogue between the brother and sister, and nothing in the story really points to Teddy wanting to fuck his mom, let alone being able to just blurt it out. Overall this was a good story, it just missing elements that would have made it stellar. If you ever write in this genre again I hope I come across it someday.

Enjoyed the story. For this author[s first story, she/he did a very good kob. Plot was logically developed. The story/characters therein realisticly appeared to be a real family headed by a single mother with a son and daughter. As someone who has no problem in real life with mutually consensual incest, this story reflected what could happen in said family. The story was believable. The sex was not outrageous.