The dialogue was a little mawkish in places, but overall very hot! Would certainly like to see this continue. Perhaps with the wife included? Or maybe take it down a BDSM path? :-)
I would love it if they did it again and she got pregnant.
Great start I think to some very hot sexual adventures for these two.
Keep up the good work!
Love to see her become his little sex toy.
Let the wife "discover" them, and let her and Jack take care of Amber. Some nice three-way with a little bondage and spanking added in.
Loved this. Would love to read more and more of their fucking adventures!
Very hot, very delicious....Jack will likely have a lively imagination and will inspire Amber's as well....well written
Keep it comming, so to speak!!! Great so far....
Parts of this story were very good, parts needed more polish, but a very worthwhile read. Forget everyone's ideas for the story line and stay with your own; you seem to be on the right track. But, seriously, whoa back on the use of "smirk." Way, way too much smirking going on. It's a word with a smug connotation, no matter it's broader application. My own preference would be moan, rather than grunt -- just seems more like pleasure, less like taking a dump. Please understand my critical comments are offered in the kindest way possible, and not as a personal offence. Anyone who writes a yarn is worth about 20 times more than a donkey ass critic.
Look forward to reading more
yes, you're a good writer make a series about these 2 or maybe add Mrs. Callahan
Great start please continue the story, I loved it.
Good first attempt. Continue, I will be coming back...
Great story! Will be waiting for the next chapter
More please! Got me hot in seconds - more!
call me and I will cum to you. TK U MLJ LV NV
Your story develops well, but could be improved by proofreading. Spellcheck will not catch the use of improper pronouns, which tends to confuse your reader.
"He quickly pulled his cock out of her tight pussy before slamming back into him"
What a hot little babysitter! I want to see more of them. She's such a naughty little girl! Maybe his wife catches them. Wow. There are many ways you can go with this storyline.
Really enjoyed the first installment, so there has to be more. Thanks
include in the next writing if Amber is on the pill or not... and how fertile she is if she isn't on the pill...
love this story! please write more.
Please continue. Very good so far...
Just plain rubbish why was she letting him Rubbish
You got me so wet, the foreplay a the beginning, Jack's orgasm description... I couldn't stop touching myself.
I'll stay posted, thanks!
Loved it and lQQk forward to further adventures with Amber. She sounds so refereshing and in Need of further guidance and hands on experience. If she needs help l will be more than happy to help;o) Joe
Adding one more compliment for this writer.
I read her second story today and liked it so well I logged on to this one and found it every bit as good. Both of them 5 star!
So by all means use those ideas you have twirling around in your head and give us more of this real good honest porn.
Yes the sitter and the dad is a bit taboo, YET, the anticipation of what was to cum was done very beautifully. I really enjoyed it. GREAT JOB!
Definately continue this series please, very hot indeed!! I love to read stories of cheating husbands ( turns me on soooooooooo much ), so feel free to submit many more. Thanks for a great read.
If anyone is interested... The next chapter of the story has been posted. It's under the "Erotic Coupling" section. It's titled Amber and Jack Ch. 02
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