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How it works (in my head)

byButterflies512©
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Comments (6)
by Anonymous

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by HarryHill11/30/12

I like this

Take a chance

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by tazz31712/01/12

BETWIXT PINNOCHIO AND CYRANO

who is the real bard. TK U MLJ LV NV

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by demure10112/03/12

Chance and coincidence -

A nicely involved poem - well done!

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by greenmountaineer12/04/12

I enjoyed this. The contrast between the awkward Cyrano and the more accomplished but tragic icons worked really well and kept my interest throughout the poem.

Being more economical with the words and lines would have made the poem better IMO. For example,

"Could he have left it there
When he was here"

The second line is redundant with the first, and the near rhymes of "there" and "here" felt forced to me because of it.

Quibble: the possessive pronoun adjective, its, doesn't have an apostrophe.

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by live4passion12/04/12

:)

"no one believes me.."

that one stanza.. remarkable.. so decisive and subtly nuanced moving in so many directions levels all at once it left my head spinning. A big spontaneous smile. Very well done.

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by Scheherazade7312/06/12

Ah, the overanalysis club...glad to meet a fellow member.
This one got under my skin.

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