All Comments on 'Snow Blind'

by unblest

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AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
Needs an Editor

The story has great potential, but you keep switching from first person to third person. There are other basic problems that simply make it hard to swallow. For example, you/he is standing in the snow cutting wood, but there is a cup of hot coffee right near by? I'm sorry, but anybody who has been out in deep snow would know that cup would be cold in minutes. It just doesn't hang together very well. Good luck, keep working at it, find an editor, and try again!

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
Unblest

is indeed unblessed. Where did this torrent of mediocre stories come from?

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