All Comments on 'Pure Blood Ch. 01'

You lost me at 38 year old mother breastfeeding a teenage son. Then you had her jerk/suck son off and suddenly she is massaging his cock with her feet. Way too short to explain how he was going to fuck his sister after mommy jerked/sucked/foot massaged her son. This isn't even a good outline of things to write about when you can give thought to what the subject of the story is.

RS

Way to short

Well, let's start at the top, why don't we? First of all, I think you were going for the username of "Taboomaster", but somehow you managed to screw that up and ended up with the A and S reversed so your user name reads "TabooMSater"? Lame, but not surprising, considering the horrible text that followed.

"...and beautifully large, motherly breasts that were always a sightly bit of skin..."

Awkward conversational dialog? Got it.

Full of typos and other misspellings? Yep. Got those too.

Did you remember to throw any concept of "pace" out the window? Oh HELL yeah. You managed to cram this little abortion into TEN crappy little paragraphs.

I could pile on more but why the hell bother? It took me longer to write this than it did to read your ridiculous "speed bump" of a story.

And just so you don't think my thoughts are unique, and that EVERYbody else just LOVES this piece of garbage, let's wait and see how many more comments appear to rip you to pieces?

The idea could be good, but there are too many problems: it is too short for an installment, there are too many misspellings, it has unbelievable ideas, and so on.

I hope the next chapter will be better...

You need to show that they're actually related, give a background, don't just say, "Ok, I only have 10 short paragraphs, so you're the mom, you're the son, quick, handjob, move to blowjob, now finish with deep throat. Perfect, time to publish."

Make this a story, not just any old sex scene where the two participants are supposedly mother and son. Show us a relationship between them, make it taboo, there's nothing in it, it's like saying they're Janet and Mike; the reader does not know who Janet or Mike are unless you tell them.

I thought this story was about a brother and sister not a mother and son. Plus them story was too short.

I was expecting to read about his deflowering his sister with maybe his mother supervising and instructing the first fuck. The mother could instruct her son how to suck his siter's tits and how to eat her pussy and get her super charged and dripping wet and how to suck all the cum out of her twat after getting fucked. She could also instruct her daughter how to suck a man's cock and get him excited, how to teasingly expose her tits to him, how to spread her legs and open her cunt for him to lust after.

i enjoyed it

Where's part 2

good concept, could use some work but sequel would be nice. Wanna read about the sister that night, just make it longer

Loved it.

Nice word choices and descriptions.

Would enjoy another chapter or another story.

I didn't get it.

Pure Blood? If he fucks his mother and she has his baby, then the lineage would surely stay pure blood. If he fucks his sister/wife and she gets pregnant again the lineage stays pure blood.

It would be a great story for the son to start a love relationship with his mother and make babies and he has his new wife/sister to also give lot of babies to.

Next installment please.