the hits just keep a coming 5ed
because while I love the first paragraph, which is a wonderful voodoo melange of imagery (that part is more than a five!), the second paragraph is not working for me. It sounds like a reading from an online oracle or some such, and maybe that's intentional but it doesn't connect up with what preceded it to me. And that has the effect of weakening the piece overall. Just my opinion and I really do think that first part is great.
Another great poem by you. I don't generally like paragraph format for poetry but it suits your style.
Vivid earthy images blended into a deeply personal stream of consciousness. Good stuff Thanks.
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