All Comments on 'Spring'

beautiful write of a dramatic monologue with a true surprise ending. This one needs to be submitted for publication to a journal or magazine, an e-zine, maybe. Very impressive writing. "Maud" made me think of Maud Gonne, as if her ghost were inhabiting the poem.

Five.

work, well done

One of your best, demure. I have to believe that even "free versers" would find delight in this. It's just so well put together. I might have sought a single syllable substitution for "Maud" in line 1 stanza 3, but that's a matter of personal taste and therefore a quibble.

It reminded me of how Anthony Hecht wrote, one of my favorite poets, although he usually chose more morose themes than what is expressed here.

The last stanza has so many wonderful components. I loved the conversational quality of it, not only the second person address, but the "it's" and the "you'd." No, we don't talk in rhymes usually, but we talk with contractions. What a wonderful way to enhance the conversational tone of the poem with the understanding, of course, it's a poem, not a conversation.

The phonics of all the subtle "ts" and "st" in the last stanza give it a subliminal mystical quality that fits so well with the narrative's climax and makes me think, "Damn! I wish I had written that!"

Clearly one of your best IMO.

Your "Maud" made me think Betjeman although your usage is clearly darker. S.O.

...and the love with which they are taught. A poignant poem for me...I hear the unsounded sighs! Well done!

A wonderful piece! Truly good!