All Comments on 'What Possessed Me - David's Story'

by FantasyXY

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  • 26 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
Interesting

Of the three people, you make David out to be the one who is a selfish egotistical bastard. Typical for the type, he doesn't even have the guts (or intelligence) to see it. He seems content with his own self-justifications.

Overall, I find it a shame, given the way the author has distributed the motivations and responsibilities, that David didn't have to pay more (literally or psychologically). But, who says life is fair?

CharlieB4CharlieB4over 10 years ago
Better than the last one

This was better than the last effort, could get inside husbands head better. Only quibble is with the plot, any divorce lawyer worth his salary could find the money he planted overseas.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
Puke, puke, puke.

The question is, what possessed the author to write such trash? Obviously the author's elevator doesn't go to the top floor.

phill1cphill1cover 10 years ago
Nice Trilogy

I enjoyed each story. I enjoyed Blake's story the most. It was the sexiest. I found the Amanda character hot, yet annoying. She makes no effort at the sexual aspect of her marriage and is surprised when the husband finds fulfillment elsewhere? I believe that David should have made a greater effort to explain how unsatisfied he was prior to taking up with the secretary.

Anyway, flawed characters make for good stories and together this was a good story. Keep it up. I gave the trilogy a 4.

Harryin VAHarryin VAover 10 years ago
I couldnt talk that evening?

really? thats the explanation? the wifes shuts down on Him sexually for YEARS... drives david to have an affair then when he gets caught demands David be forced to watch?

gee does anyone see ANYTHING wrong with this?

David is not only a wimp he is mighty fucking stupid. Once the cunt whore wife found out about his affair he should of moved on to the attack.

Reverse the situation ... suppose HE had shut down on her sexually for years then she decided to step out. EVERYONE would be saying well it is partially HIS fault.

The FACT that the wife would NOT talk about the BJ and swallowing act she did with the other guy is EXTREMELY Damaging.

If the cunt whore wife has opened up and decided to talk about that night/ sex with the other guy THEN she would have to explain WHY she never did that sort of stuff with her so called loving husband. She would HAVE to admit that her attitude is vile and twisted and unhealthy and totally unjustified. That conversation would force the the wife to SHE is the one that drive David to the Affair and destroyed the marriage.

a stupid mindless shallow story.

IronDragonIronDragonover 10 years ago
The problem with a prude wife...

That's the problem when your wife is a prude. She won't suck a cock, except for another guy? Hell, she should have just spared her hubby and herself the shit and divorced him instead. Revenge fucks don't usually end well, especially if she's willing to go further with her revenge fuck buddy than with her own hubby.

At least my wife is faithful and definitely NOT a prude! :D

As to the tale itself, what possessed you to even write it? None of your characters were sympathetic in any way. While the sex was decently done and the scenario's outcome was pretty realistic at the end, it just seems like the husband and wife characters have a combined IQ of about 80. Blake was the only one with more than half a brain... but not by much.

2 Stars

tiger46tiger46over 10 years ago
best of the three

would have been better with some dialogue. Nice work.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
A good trilogy.....

Amanda was a frigid soccer mom. Blake was just a player. And David was stuck in a loveless marriage.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago

This whole thing had to be written by a woman. Men don't think this way. I'm gonna have to whole heartedly agree with Harry! They guy was way too wimpy and stupid. There is not a single man alive who is already halfway out the door that would put up with the shit in the hotel room. He is sleeping with someone much better but yet he puts up with that and then sticks around for a few months!?!? Bullshit!!! It doesn't take even 48 hours to move all your money so that argument is out. She is a fatty and he doesn't want to stay married so the only reason to have him put up with the hotel thing is for the woman to get her pound of flesh. This was supposed to be the husbands account but all it does it give the woman her revenge due. Like I said it was written by a woman!!!

laptopwriterlaptopwriterover 10 years ago
I actually scored all three of these pretty good, but

I thought the premise was great but they all could have been done better; more detail, more emotions, Also, the change in tense is aggravating; the author needs to watch that. I didn't like the change in attitude; the boy toy says the hubby was angry; hubby says he was turned on. I liked it better with the husband angry, she should have showed that in this episode.

Still, I thought the series was better than the score shows.

SparksWillFlySparksWillFlyover 10 years ago
Doesn't Ring True

He enjoyed watching his wife sucking another man's prick, let her jerk him off using the other man's cum. Then he got mad and divorced her because she denied him a blow job. Submissive cuckold one minute; man with a set the next. Nah.

FantasyXYFantasyXYover 10 years agoAuthor
Author's Comment

Author’s comments - I’m not sure this is ever done, but I am doing it. Feel free to continue to comment on the stories, but please don’t comment on the comments.

First, I’d like to thank everyone that commented on these stories. I appreciate every one of the comments, even the negative ones. I was happy to see that there was so much passion about the characters and what they did in these stories. All of my previous submissions only invoked enough reader passion to gather three paltry comments between them.

My latest passion seems to be reading and writing “true confession” style stories, especially those written from the female point of view. I am about as far from being a professional writer as one can get, and I found it a challenge to tell a story only through a character's own words. My idea of writing about the same event as experienced by three different people added to the challenge. The inconsistency between the accounts is supposed to show a “this is how I remember it” element in the stories, but I see I could have varied the accounts a little bit more to add some interest. (similar to how different witnesses recount a crime)

I also see through the comments that I failed miserably in conveying the stories main theme. The theme is how each person came to a point where they gave in to a situation that they knew couldn't have a good outcome. In this trilogy as each character tells their story, the tipping point for each character is punctuated by the phrase “I don’t know what possessed me to do this, but…” After reading the comments I realize that I didn’t emphasize the “I don’t know what possessed me” point strongly enough.

Finally, I don’t feel that a reader should fall in love with every character in a story but a lot of readers seem to want to. Remember how everyone hated Nurse Ratched, but we gave the actress that played her an Oscar. I do agree with the comment that said every story needs someone to root for. I found that conveying the hero is probably the hardest part in writing in the true confession style story.

One last thought – There needs to be a “Cheating and Betrayal” category on Literotica. (It seems like this category was there years ago) These stories and many other “Loving Wives” stories would fit much better in that category.

FireFox59FireFox59over 10 years ago
Interesting

To see the events from all three people involved POV. Fairly well written. Didn't really like the stories mostly because I like to have at least one person I can root for and like in a story. All three of these people are screwed up.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
Wow, slow day on lit.

Story could have been ok but like others I disliked everybody, notably the wife. Nobody I know would have let her pull this shit in the first place and she makes it clear she has no love for her husband, so divorce is the end result. Try again with at least one person in the story to like.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
surprise

It happens all the time. You write and write and then the readers completely miss what you thought was the main point.

Live and learn Fantasy XY.

Unfortunately it looks like you haven't been around the LW category. You should read around, it will open your eyes.

I gave you 3* for the effort. Keep writing.

Nothing new here with these 3 points Of view.

A Merry Man

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 10 years ago
Just Read Your Author's Comments

You write well when it's sincere and from the heart. Some of your stories would benefit from that, they need SUCH an editor's overhaul.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 6 years ago
1*

another cocksucking WIMP posting DUMB cuck SHIT.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 6 years ago

he was a dumb asshole

AnonymousAnonymousabout 6 years ago
5!! Wel annony

if anyone knows assholes, it's you!!! you're the king of assholes on LIT and all of humanity!!

tazz317tazz317about 6 years ago
WHO EVER SAID OR THOUGHT,,,, WATCHING IS BETTER THAN DOING

needs to be in the insanity ward of the nearest facility. TK U MLJ LV NV

AnonymousAnonymousover 5 years ago
well done

I liked the story with each of the main players giving their recollections and motives. This was a dying marriage waiting for the big event to trigger the divorce. full grades on all parts.

26thNC26thNCover 5 years ago
Ended

Marriage has no chance, Amanda just killed it quicker. So he is the bad guy for not stopping her on the blow job. Yeah, right.

AnonymousAnonymousover 3 years ago
Why didn't Blake suffer for fucking with this man's wife?

Well, one could point out that David is not at all assertive. After all, he put up with a sexless marriage for years. One might also observe that he has some cuckold tendencies if not outright desires.

The most basic truth in this sad situation, however, is that Amanda's revenge show reveals to David he no longer gives a fuck about his fat, frigid and soon to be former wife. Good riddence, he realizes, to that prudish cow.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 3 years ago
why watch in person?

She saw his sex video. Dave should say fine, make your own video. He said he was done with her anyway and just making time for financial reasons pre divorce. He could easily convince her that makes it even.

management91399management91399almost 3 years ago

I kind of like that Amanda and Blake were playing one game while David was quietly playing a completely different game and let himself get "punished" while simultaneously moving his money around and boning his girlfriend anyway. The big loser here is Amanda but at least she doesn't have to be asked to suck cock anymore so there's that, +1 for her. Blake gets a hot memory with a MILF while he rides off into the sunset with his bride-to-be (Unless Karma visits itself upon his happy future) and Michael wins the relationship contest. Sadly all seem to be very emotionally detached throughout, usually, we get to read the Strum and Drang of these breakups, even one as silly as this. Sad that the kids even tho very much in the background don't seem to be mentioned to much. Otherwise a nice little twist. I usually hate the same story told multiple times from different perspectives but this one worked for me, maybe because it was so compact, to begin with. I'll dig through some of the rest of your work, this was pretty good.

AnonymousAnonymous8 months ago

There are almost no difference among all of these tales: almost always the same theme, the femdom-fetish-cuck fantasies., that would stay better under the fetish category.

Anonymous
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FantasyXY - aka Fantasy Man (Men have the XY chromosome) I enjoy writing erotic stories and am not afraid to experiment. I also have what some have called a wicked sense of humor. Most of my stories are done tongue-in-cheek. A good bit of my stuff is pretty bad, but you m...