All Comments on 'It started in June'

nice , Des !

good encasement (as per usual)

suggest change of order here

A cartoon angel on one shoulder,

a devil on the next

(foreshadow)

possible shortening the last line.

Crazy's a lot less funny since then.

(heighten impact and get out)

This is one of the most complex and intriguing poems I have ever read. Gave it a 5.

Well done, Desejo. I've met a few poor souls such as her over the years. Maybe I'm making more of it than you intended, but I liked the contrast between Seattle and Boston. It suggested to me someone in search of something and going to great lengths. The iconic religious contrasts also added to the poem. I agree with 1201 about the last line, perhaps even to the point of having excluded it.

I'm not really sensing a rhythm to the poem when I read it aloud, either the kind you'd expect or verse.

The use of enjambment also puzzles me.

....has been said by others for me, too late to the table but I can tell you I gave it 5.

This may be an unorthodox response, but this poem is not meant to be read aloud. In fact, I should not have even left the ratings on - and I probably will voting off it. Enjambment and musicality are issues I probably do need to work on, and thank you for pointing that out. But in this poem, the disjointedness and monotone correspond to what I wanted.

1201 - that's a good suggestion. I may change it. Greenmountaineer - there is no way I could lose that last line - integral to the entire sad experience.

Five.

perfect insanity