All Comments on 'Tentacle Captive'

by ifonlytofly

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  • 13 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
ok

Could use more details, draw out how she was played with. Maybe some tossing of her breasts, or how the tentacles continues moving down her throat as she moaned wan tingly.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
Pretty Good

It could use a little more detail. The point of view kind of changes in the middle from what she is feeling to what a bystander may be seeing. It is a good story, you just need to flesh it out some more.

Thank you for letting us read your work, and please continue to write.

Sherrylee1015

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago

NonHuman.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
I really like this, but--

it made me think of a horror novel about vines I read a year or so ago--and now I've forgotten its name.

It was, as is this, a good story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
There is something REALLY DIFFERENT

about not taking any prescribed "speed" of any kind--

I feel so relaxed--

that I can imagine almost (not truly mean stuff--and don't mess up my genuine pleasure) anything--

I'm not just imagining that I feel different and happier without whatever kinds of "speed"--

I did not choose this med. I'd never taken it before. I just went to a "doctor" because a teacher had suggested I have my "gifted" son tested for "ADHD."

I, at least (my son refused to take any "meds"), was chemically raped. I know that sounds--mad.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
Fate was on my (and my son's) side when--

after about 20? 30? minutes of initial ingestion of a very low dose cap of Adderall, slow (before "Vyvance") release.

He said it made him feel bad. He didn't like it.

He "didn't like it."

"They gave me heroin. They gave me crack. Whatever--"

maybe it's cause my mum breast-fed me for 2 years. Whatever.

(She'd like to think this.)

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
"Speed" is no fun.

And I've had legal scripts for it.

I'm guessing here--if it's "fun," then , you have a legal script for it.

If it's not fun and maybe hate it, then the entire thing is a mistake.

The thing is, with all the people wanted to take--whatever--just be glad if you don't like it. And don't take it.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
"'Will you take this--thing--

into your mouth? So you won't hurt anyone you love?'

'O. Ok.'"

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
I can't believe--

just for example--middle-aged and older women--just for example-- can be prescribed "speed." But if it's that great, maybe I should have kept my scripts up?

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
I like "no speed"--

it makes me a

limp

.........

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
I know. There are all these people who love

--to try to use a generic name--"mixed salts"?

I'm not trying to stop you. For a test, a party, whatever--

This "med"--and I didn't even take much--almost killed me.

I can't help but think--even if it's only me--that's a pretty big deal.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 10 years ago
Interesting

I remember a similar scene in the movie "Evil Dead" from the 70's or 80's. Interesting how you developed it. There are some spelling errors that detract from the story that you may want to edit. Like "they're being incredibly perky" would be "their being incredibly perky".

Anonymous
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